After Comedy Central re-aired "The Coon" episode of South Park tonight, I decided to reopen the debate on "Who is Mysterion".

We know two things about Mysterion's identity:

1. It's a kid in Mr. Garrison's class. We know this from Cartman's thought that only someone in his class would've known that the Coon would be on the roof of Walgreen's, from Mr. Garrison's statement at the end of the episode, and from Mysterion's statement that Kyle is "the smartest kid in class".

2. It's someone who Cartman accused of being Mysterion at some point, because of what he says when Mysterion unmasks himself at the end.

We can eliminate the following: Cartman (obviously), Butters (because he's professor Chaos), Wendy (because Cartman never guesses her name), and Kyle (because Mysterion talks to Kyle).

That means the remaining suspects are: Stan, Kenny, Clyde, and Craig. Let's look into each candidate one at a time.

STAN:
Evidence in support of Stan is the use of the firecracker in making his escape from Cartman outside of the Police Station. We know Stan's uncle Jimbo is a fan of fireworks and would gladly have been his supplier.

I've seen an argument that Stan would not speak so formally to Kyle as Mysterion did, but if Mysterion were Stan, then he clearly didn't trust Kyle with his identity to begin with. It also seems likely that Stan would seek out Kyle, his best friend, whether he wished to reveal his identity or not.

The questionable thing about Stan is the comment that Kyle is the smartest kid in class. It seems clear that the two smartest people in the class are Kyle and Wendy. Would Stan believe that Kyle is smarter than Wendy, his girlfriend? I don't know...

KENNY:
There's not a lot of evidence either way for Kenny. Some would argue that Kenny couldn't afford the costume, but I don't get the feeling that wearing a hood and your underwear over your pants is particularly expensive... Plus Kenny was able to afford a PSP in the episode "Best Friends Forever". Not a whole lot to go on here.

CRAIG:
The knock against Craig is that he was vocally against the "adventures" the other boys always have during the "Pandemic" episodes. But we've seen Craig play along with the Ninja weapons in "Good Times with Weapons" and The Lord of the Rings in "The Return of the Fellowship of the Rings to the Two Towers". So the question here is, would Craig be opposed to masquerading as a superhero at night? I don't think he would.

CLYDE:
Clyde seems to be the most popular choice mostly because he fell asleep in class. People think this implies that Clyde is tired from running around all night, but there are two problems with this theory. One, Mysterion doesn't appear until the night after Clyde fell asleep in class. Two, Cartman stays up all night as the Coon and doesn't appear to succumb to his fatigue in class.

What can we conclude? Pretty much nothing.

Due to the non-reveal ending of the episode there's also a good chance that Mysterion HAS no identity.

I can't belief I wasted my time on this, but feel free to discuss.