See, that's actually the opposite view I have of the Ajahs. The problems the Yellows in Salidar give Nynaeve, or Romanda's dismissal of Bode as a Green or Blue, based on her personality, without even considering her potential ability at Healing, all contradict the Sandersonian version Suana gives Egwene.

Judging by abilities, there's a lot of different ways characters could go. Cadsuane should be a Red, since she's the best at finding male channelers, but Alanna says the primary attribute of a Green is loving men, and not too many other sisters would have reacted as Cadsuane did when Min told her about Rand's abuse at the hands of Elaida's embassy. You don't have to have sex with them as Cadsuane is strongly suggested to never have done, and indeed, the first distinctive description we get of Green sisters is them sitting up outside their tents late into the night socializing with their Warders on the road from Fal Dara to the river. If they had been the sex fiends others make them out to be, they'd have been inside the tents getting it on. Meanwhile, other notable Greens have different skills (as Alanna notes). Vandene is probably a more knowledgable scholar than many Browns, but Moiraine notes that her personality & priorities (when she expressed concern over Moiraine's warder) prove she is a Green. People note Elayne's diplomatic tendencies and suggest her political skills might suit her for the Blue, she is sufficiently good at abstract thinking and prioritizing her rational choices over her emotional attachments to make a White with the right training, and her reverse engineering talents could be translated into scholarship, whereas she does very little fighting with the One Power, especially compared to her future Yellow partner. What makes Elayne (and Egwene, for that matter) a Green is her personality, that she goes after what she sees as necessary without counting the costs, and she prioritizes defending people against other channelers, in her pursuit of the Black sisters in Caemlyn. Nynaeve, who does get into a number of fights, and does rather well, is a Yellow, not a Green, because Healing is her priority, even more so than the other Yellows, who have come to place the Healing weave as the most important thing, above the effect, hence their dismissal of her herbs. And Nynaeve almost instinctively heals more than just physical injuries, such as her rallying the Malkieri around Lan - she healed the one PoV Malkieri's resentment of the Tower and estrangement from the Malkieri cause (which he, and many others, including Lan, had come to see as a futile waste that would consume the surviving population to no gain). Meanwhile, Greens are noted to be hierarchal, which is fine for people who are as ambitious as Egwene, while sufficiently devoid of leadership skills that she requires a hierarchy to make people fall in line with her authority, or for Elayne who is at least as serious about the rule of law as her own success, but not for Nynaeve, who has no use for rules that don't serve her immediate purposes. Moiraine can Heal as well as any ordinary Yellow described in the series, has enough of a rep in the Borderlands that any Green could be proud of, and when it comes to finding male channelers, the size of her single catch blows any Red sister out of the water. But she's a Blue, because she prioritizes her cause over everything, even people or institutions. Egwene could be a Blue or Gray or Red with her skills, but she lacks the focus of a Red (or the ability to apply that focus outside of the narrow areas in which she has extraordinary focus) or Blue, or the interest in procedures that defines a Gray.

The only mitigating circumstance I see regarding the rapey stuff in Harry Potter is that since it's a series about kids, for kids, JK Rowling knows they are not going to have sex, because she is not writing about sexy times, so that is not what comes to mind with the love potions, more like the embarassment of public behavior, rather than the vulnerability in private.