Active Users:1108 Time:23/11/2024 12:53:33 AM
That's really awful. Vivien Send a noteboard - 16/06/2011 09:16:33 PM
He was so focused on how I should be sexually, that when I broke up with him, I literally felt waves of relief passing through me with the realization that I would never have to have sex with him again. I didn't realize how negatively he had impacted me until that moment. Obviously the relationship didn't last long.

Once when I told him a position was painful for me. He responded by explaining that Asian prostitutes get over such things by just continuing until it no longer hurts. It didn't occur to him that contrary to prostitutes I don't have sex for his pleasure alone. He really just made me crawl into a shell. I became less willing to do things I would normally be comfortable doing.


That's really messed up. So messed up to form judgments of what women should be doing based on what persons who are having sex for money are willing to do- either prostitutes and porn stars. But no woman wants to think of herself as prudish or frigid. It's tempting not to date men at all in order not to deal with any expectations /accusations of frigidity.
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He’s Just Not That Into Anyone (an article about watching porn and men's changing libidos). - 11/06/2011 10:52:10 PM 3156 Views
I disagree with the whole last third or fourth of the article. - 12/06/2011 02:01:40 AM 940 Views
Re: I disagree with the whole last third or fourth of the article. - 12/06/2011 08:49:39 PM 1218 Views
A lot of guys who get hooked on porn don't know how to approach women - 12/06/2011 10:55:17 PM 1157 Views
Funny - 13/06/2011 01:22:28 AM 1131 Views
You obviously never had a fulfilling long term sexual relationship with a woman. - 13/06/2011 10:43:23 AM 900 Views
Oh My - 13/06/2011 03:29:34 PM 947 Views
*giggle* - 13/06/2011 03:46:28 PM 971 Views
What did I do to put a bee in your bonnet? *NM* - 13/06/2011 06:23:01 PM 429 Views
Bee? - 13/06/2011 06:24:35 PM 935 Views
Oh, I tend to be loving and appreciative - 13/06/2011 05:08:56 PM 894 Views
That isnt fair, Helene *NM* - 13/06/2011 06:22:25 PM 473 Views
What isn't fair? - 13/06/2011 08:07:08 PM 1099 Views
I'm not looking for someone to fix, but the not fair bit I was refering to was little irony dig *NM* - 13/06/2011 10:10:11 PM 495 Views
You don't need to be broken to enjoy being appreciated - 13/06/2011 10:17:01 PM 900 Views
No, Helene, You repeatedly attempt to sidetrack discussion with attacks against my person - 13/06/2011 10:20:01 PM 1033 Views
But it makes me feel good - 13/06/2011 10:45:07 PM 908 Views
I'm not a hedonist - 13/06/2011 10:57:25 PM 1065 Views
So indignant! - 13/06/2011 11:53:41 PM 1064 Views
I don't believe that at all. - 13/06/2011 04:48:26 AM 1049 Views
Entirely agree *NM* - 13/06/2011 04:33:04 PM 518 Views
Showing appreciation is a losing strategy. - 13/06/2011 04:55:09 AM 1009 Views
So you don't know how to open a woman up sexually - 13/06/2011 10:51:17 AM 1016 Views
Oh how clever of you! - 13/06/2011 09:59:01 PM 1103 Views
Not to gang up on you or anything, but... - 13/06/2011 10:15:57 PM 1029 Views
It's that the prudishness is indicative of a more general sense of entitlement and manipulativeness. - 13/06/2011 11:02:20 PM 1107 Views
Yes. And "passive-aggressive behavior" is another one I'd add. *NM* - 13/06/2011 11:18:40 PM 379 Views
So far in this debate, you've only displayed your feelings of entitlement - 14/06/2011 12:05:16 AM 909 Views
Guys have their own problems, but the conversation is revolving around women at the moment. *NM* *NM* - 14/06/2011 01:23:20 AM 488 Views
The conversation did start being about MEN's problems. - 14/06/2011 03:36:36 AM 976 Views
Be good, Ana. - 14/06/2011 03:40:12 AM 757 Views
You may be mistaken. - 14/06/2011 03:54:28 AM 987 Views
Thats unfortuanate, Ana - 14/06/2011 03:58:50 AM 883 Views
I am introspecting, yes. - 14/06/2011 04:02:32 AM 888 Views
No, I wasnt attempting to do so - 14/06/2011 04:09:29 AM 1046 Views
Re: You may be mistaken. - 15/06/2011 01:21:16 AM 1037 Views
The only reason the conversation is revolving around women is because Tom laid all the blame at - 14/06/2011 07:35:34 AM 1071 Views
Let's be clear: I was speaking about American women *NM* - 14/06/2011 02:10:10 PM 385 Views
Oh, that part is quite clear. *NM* - 14/06/2011 08:25:08 PM 504 Views
Wow.. all the misogynists came out to play - 13/06/2011 11:57:05 PM 1079 Views
I'm glad you're in here. - 14/06/2011 12:04:03 AM 1029 Views
Seconded *NM* - 14/06/2011 04:46:38 PM 451 Views
I don't see a lot of misogyny. - 14/06/2011 12:59:06 AM 846 Views
You are blind to misogyny because you lack awareness in that area - 14/06/2011 07:38:48 AM 910 Views
Okay, so I'm a date rapist and a misogynist...real classy - 14/06/2011 02:11:40 PM 845 Views
I neither called you a date rapist nor a misogynist - 14/06/2011 03:10:46 PM 881 Views
Why misogynist? Why not Anti-American? - 14/06/2011 01:32:17 AM 1402 Views
So, which women are better than American women? - 14/06/2011 03:38:38 AM 1050 Views
Re: Haha - 14/06/2011 04:18:46 AM 949 Views
You seem very intent on coming off as the smartest guy in the room. - 14/06/2011 04:40:26 AM 1047 Views
I think that's an unfair characterization of the RP board - 14/06/2011 04:58:29 AM 931 Views
Ha! I'm just fucking around. - 14/06/2011 05:14:20 AM 970 Views
Re: Ha! I'm just fucking around. - 14/06/2011 05:42:37 AM 794 Views
Who are you, again? - 14/06/2011 05:07:04 AM 783 Views
Tsk. I need to be more memorable. - 14/06/2011 05:16:33 AM 1116 Views
Well, try to be more openminded. - 14/06/2011 05:22:52 AM 1012 Views
Fair enough. I do quite like Gaps. - 14/06/2011 05:31:05 AM 1009 Views
Why all this vitriol? - 14/06/2011 05:18:16 AM 975 Views
Book clubs? Bullshit! women shouldn't be reading at all!!! - 15/06/2011 01:28:41 AM 991 Views
Re: Oh wow, nice. - 14/06/2011 12:25:53 PM 785 Views
Perhaps one day I'll get a Chinese husband. - 14/06/2011 04:41:59 AM 1088 Views
Spain, Norway, Japan? - 14/06/2011 04:38:43 AM 1042 Views
Norway is the only one that passes. - 14/06/2011 01:14:54 PM 888 Views
I really like the Netherlands - 14/06/2011 01:29:08 PM 957 Views
Re: I really like the Netherlands - 14/06/2011 04:51:11 PM 859 Views
Why did I pick that one? Because you completely ignore men's part in a culture that sexually - 14/06/2011 07:54:39 AM 1044 Views
Helene, you're also not an American woman. - 14/06/2011 01:03:23 PM 1053 Views
You're not American either. *NM* - 14/06/2011 02:26:34 PM 339 Views
I didn't ignore it at all. I just bracketed it. It's quite possible, you know. - 14/06/2011 08:49:03 PM 1030 Views
You have strange expectations and ideas of me. *NM* - 14/06/2011 08:52:09 PM 425 Views
Likewise. BFF? *NM* - 14/06/2011 09:08:53 PM 368 Views
Nice! /me high Fives Helene!! *NM* - 14/06/2011 02:32:27 AM 348 Views
Oh, but I can do any and all of these things! - 14/06/2011 12:06:41 AM 1034 Views
I said there were exceptions. - 14/06/2011 03:50:27 AM 894 Views
True. - 14/06/2011 09:03:46 PM 863 Views
hey! I really like your poem "name" - syllables knowing other lovers - excellent. - 15/06/2011 01:49:06 AM 830 Views
Thanks! *NM* - 15/06/2011 09:44:18 PM 489 Views
I agree. - 13/06/2011 01:23:51 PM 995 Views
Obviously inside the bedroom. - 13/06/2011 05:17:31 PM 1079 Views
Inside the bedroom? Sure. I could agree. But you're not American anyway. - 13/06/2011 08:52:42 PM 954 Views
You're basically just saying that American attitudes toward sex results in repressed women - 13/06/2011 09:03:47 PM 1033 Views
Theoretically they can be "unrepressed". But why waste the time and effort? - 13/06/2011 10:06:52 PM 1090 Views
How can you tell it's because she cares, instead of because that's what's traditionally expected - 13/06/2011 10:48:12 PM 1006 Views
That's a good point! *NM* - 15/06/2011 04:49:11 AM 472 Views
The answer is that it doesn't matter. - 16/06/2011 05:35:47 PM 1079 Views
I agree that the answer doesn't matter - 16/06/2011 07:09:44 PM 769 Views
It's funny - 13/06/2011 02:51:03 PM 1155 Views
Well of course you can't see the faults of American women. You're American. - 13/06/2011 08:51:35 PM 1051 Views
I'm sure that American women, along with all other women on earth - 13/06/2011 09:00:33 PM 1071 Views
It's not my job to make a girl comfortable about her sexuality. - 13/06/2011 10:03:27 PM 963 Views
THIS *NM* - 13/06/2011 10:09:14 PM 454 Views
If the sex is all there is, then yes, makes sense. - 13/06/2011 10:18:15 PM 1052 Views
Who willingly goes into a relationship knowing the sex will be bad? - 14/06/2011 03:52:43 AM 959 Views
You and your friends? - 14/06/2011 05:46:53 AM 940 Views
And you don't think that the men in these relationships contributed to the current situation at all? - 14/06/2011 07:59:15 AM 755 Views
In this particular aspect, absolutely not. - 14/06/2011 02:19:33 PM 944 Views
Of course I consider that you might be right - 14/06/2011 03:59:50 PM 1059 Views
I'm not ignoring any complexities - 14/06/2011 05:00:04 PM 1007 Views
Loads of people, if that's compensated by other things? - 14/06/2011 08:38:45 PM 1113 Views
I would rather be in a good marriage with bad sex than the other way around *NM* - 14/06/2011 10:33:27 PM 534 Views
I suspect that you are in a good marriage with good sex. - 16/06/2011 01:55:29 AM 1032 Views
Of course it is your job as a sex partner to make your partner feel comfortable about being with you - 13/06/2011 10:50:52 PM 892 Views
THIS. *NM* - 13/06/2011 11:49:28 PM 432 Views
I was going to say the same. - 14/06/2011 12:11:18 AM 1079 Views
Like fucking Hell it is. - 14/06/2011 12:18:02 AM 846 Views
You're totally cracking me up in here. - 14/06/2011 12:30:39 AM 981 Views
You think you're offending me? - 14/06/2011 01:10:56 AM 987 Views
No. - 14/06/2011 08:01:45 PM 1016 Views
Have you ever been accused of date rape? - 14/06/2011 12:46:30 AM 809 Views
No. And that's an absurd question. - 14/06/2011 01:08:13 AM 880 Views
No, the point you were arguing was absurd. I just pointed out what you were arguing. - 14/06/2011 08:03:13 AM 1054 Views
Let's cut the sophistry - 14/06/2011 02:24:52 PM 1043 Views
What's the definition of prude anyway? - 14/06/2011 03:58:03 PM 917 Views
If that's what you wanted to say, it would have helped for you to be more explicit. - 14/06/2011 04:10:43 PM 975 Views
"Why do these women use sex as a manipulative tool?" - 14/06/2011 05:06:33 PM 1016 Views
It seems to me there is a very simple answer to that question. - 14/06/2011 05:26:09 PM 920 Views
I don't think it works at all. - 14/06/2011 05:48:48 PM 889 Views
Your anecdotal evidence suggests otherwise. - 14/06/2011 06:31:28 PM 1159 Views
I don't think so. - 15/06/2011 03:50:25 AM 909 Views
I agree with every single thing you just said. *NM* - 15/06/2011 05:03:05 AM 362 Views
Oddly enough, I do too - 15/06/2011 02:00:39 PM 1008 Views
I agree with Sareitha. Women do that because it (apears to) works for them, in the short term - 14/06/2011 08:28:11 PM 857 Views
I can't see that I would put up with that either - 14/06/2011 10:32:09 PM 942 Views
Right - 14/06/2011 10:59:10 PM 927 Views
mode was a typeo but I guess it still works - 14/06/2011 11:23:11 PM 1033 Views
A fairly self-aware American. With many female friends, even - 13/06/2011 11:59:34 PM 1029 Views
Yeah I don't buy that "most American girls are prudes" concept - 14/06/2011 04:10:37 PM 647 Views
A moment - 14/06/2011 05:01:05 PM 888 Views
Camilla, I'm trying to keep this at arm's length a bit. - 14/06/2011 05:42:18 PM 892 Views
But you started it. - 14/06/2011 08:43:47 PM 961 Views
I did start it, yes. - 16/06/2011 03:32:54 PM 933 Views
You should have quit before this. - 16/06/2011 03:46:01 PM 1011 Views
No, I shouldn't have. - 16/06/2011 04:03:21 PM 952 Views
The problem with your list is that it's performance-oriented. - 16/06/2011 10:45:22 PM 910 Views
Of course it's performance-oriented. - 16/06/2011 10:54:22 PM 854 Views
This really made me laugh - 16/06/2011 04:26:32 PM 926 Views
Re: I did start it, yes. - 16/06/2011 03:46:06 PM 827 Views
Yes, we do! - 16/06/2011 04:04:02 PM 1020 Views
Having now looked over the smileys - 16/06/2011 04:09:55 PM 996 Views
See what I'm talking about? - 16/06/2011 07:09:10 PM 918 Views
That may have been the worst pun ever! *NM* - 17/06/2011 12:47:50 AM 466 Views
I try *NM* - 17/06/2011 09:57:32 AM 454 Views
Take is up the ass or you are a prude? - 16/06/2011 04:09:54 PM 1139 Views
You didn't read the list very well. - 16/06/2011 07:08:19 PM 958 Views
It appears I didn't read it very well. I apologize for that - 16/06/2011 10:16:02 PM 916 Views
No problems. - 16/06/2011 10:57:46 PM 855 Views
Re: The idea that If it hurts it's not being done right - Not neccessarily. - 17/06/2011 01:13:18 AM 963 Views
It just requires more preparation. - 17/06/2011 04:49:52 AM 1324 Views
I have to say, I actually find this list reasonable. - 16/06/2011 04:35:40 PM 931 Views
I agree - 16/06/2011 05:10:07 PM 853 Views
Exactly! It's the "nexus of activity" sort of idea. - 16/06/2011 07:18:33 PM 795 Views
If I weren't such a prude (3), I would post this list to facebook. - 16/06/2011 05:08:05 PM 1021 Views
In other words, you aren't a prude on that scale. - 16/06/2011 07:20:35 PM 825 Views
Eh - 16/06/2011 08:17:31 PM 1028 Views
You mixed up prudishness and sexual compatibility with you - 16/06/2011 05:21:31 PM 1036 Views
This. *NM* - 16/06/2011 06:18:41 PM 501 Views
No I didn't. - 16/06/2011 07:14:27 PM 938 Views
Calling my response a knee jerk reaction is just silly, and in itself, a knee jerk response. - 16/06/2011 07:38:28 PM 1141 Views
Okay. I'm going to just stop replying. - 16/06/2011 08:28:02 PM 737 Views
Your world view is just too self referential to be - 16/06/2011 08:36:39 PM 956 Views
As is yours. *NM* - 16/06/2011 08:44:10 PM 344 Views
That makes no sense. You have the narrower view. *NM* - 16/06/2011 09:07:37 PM 454 Views
So you say. *NM* - 16/06/2011 09:09:21 PM 441 Views
Question - 16/06/2011 07:42:37 PM 945 Views
Ha Ha, who cares about the guy? It is only female sexuality that is on trial. - 16/06/2011 08:06:33 PM 872 Views
That is an incorrect assumption. - 16/06/2011 08:30:08 PM 897 Views
Awww you didn't take my bait! - 16/06/2011 08:44:16 PM 824 Views
There's very little I haven't been willing to do - 16/06/2011 08:52:31 PM 932 Views
Hehehe, But *I* recall it! - 16/06/2011 09:22:40 PM 973 Views
Wait, I think I know what you're talking about. - 16/06/2011 09:27:20 PM 929 Views
Damn, I was going to guess "in a coffin". - 16/06/2011 09:31:36 PM 1131 Views
Seriously? - 16/06/2011 09:50:20 PM 949 Views
The girl was never a girlfriend or a sexual partner. - 16/06/2011 11:06:38 PM 931 Views
I'm reminded of an ex of mine - 16/06/2011 08:32:34 PM 750 Views
That's really awful. - 16/06/2011 09:16:33 PM 1031 Views
Of course. - 16/06/2011 08:29:11 PM 787 Views
Fair enough *NM* - 17/06/2011 07:20:38 PM 454 Views
THIS!! LISTEN!! the woman is * lightbulb* speaking from a woman's perspective. - 14/06/2011 02:52:26 AM 1045 Views
Your way out of line - 14/06/2011 02:55:46 AM 832 Views
Wondering why we're still single, are we? Try a minimum of politeness first. - 14/06/2011 03:21:15 AM 792 Views
What B/c i sank you YOUR level? Piss Off. AS if I give 2 shits what you think about me. - 16/06/2011 02:19:04 AM 1121 Views
I read this. - 16/06/2011 03:40:51 AM 1012 Views
The name-calling is uncalled for, Rebecca - 16/06/2011 11:10:04 AM 986 Views
Given the vehemence of your response, you do care. - 16/06/2011 03:19:42 PM 1016 Views
I appreciate the support, - 14/06/2011 10:37:20 PM 986 Views
Your journal entry is revealing. You sound bitter and hurt. I hope you find the healing you need. - 15/06/2011 01:40:23 AM 994 Views
You know what? not called for. *NM* - 15/06/2011 02:05:14 PM 324 Views
Why not? - 15/06/2011 11:59:36 PM 898 Views
The first portion of what you said, isn't yours to say. - 16/06/2011 03:43:57 PM 716 Views
I'm with Anastasia on this. - 16/06/2011 06:39:56 PM 1045 Views
Re: It's funny - 14/06/2011 03:50:13 AM 1016 Views
Re: It's funny - 14/06/2011 10:28:32 PM 1063 Views
On a completely unrelated note - 14/06/2011 11:03:58 PM 933 Views
Re: On a completely unrelated note - 14/06/2011 11:14:18 PM 967 Views
Bummer *NM* - 14/06/2011 11:20:24 PM 432 Views
TMJ is right. - 15/06/2011 02:11:57 PM 1002 Views
Re: TMJ is right. - 16/06/2011 12:22:10 AM 1060 Views
Yes. - 16/06/2011 03:41:05 PM 876 Views
Re: Yes. - 17/06/2011 01:51:11 AM 810 Views
Gee thanks. - 17/06/2011 05:04:37 AM 1256 Views
Didn't suit you. - 18/06/2011 12:58:53 AM 1010 Views
On a totally unrelated note... - 15/06/2011 01:43:23 AM 955 Views
Excuse me while I go hit something. A journalism major perhaps. *NM* - 12/06/2011 09:09:26 PM 443 Views
Stunning rebuttal!!! *NM* - 12/06/2011 10:07:39 PM 330 Views
Theres nothing there I really need to refute.... - 13/06/2011 01:20:43 AM 875 Views
Well, thanks for contributing nothing to the discussion. *NM* - 13/06/2011 04:41:56 AM 337 Views
Is there a reason you feel the need to jump up my ass? *NM* - 13/06/2011 05:16:53 AM 491 Views
Your winning personality? - 13/06/2011 03:45:09 PM 971 Views
I'd say 'endearing' is the proper term. - 13/06/2011 10:43:01 PM 899 Views
Nice name new. - 15/06/2011 01:44:25 AM 920 Views
Wow. Interesting. *NM* - 13/06/2011 07:04:08 AM 424 Views
Giving up porn (a male perspective) - 13/06/2011 04:29:52 PM 1019 Views
Thanks for sharing. ^_^ *NM* - 13/06/2011 09:05:51 PM 485 Views
Re: It's a sexy topic, but all these generalizations are becoming wet blankets. - 14/06/2011 02:13:31 AM 1005 Views
I think you are spot on with the seal theory. - 14/06/2011 05:16:59 PM 1058 Views
[something less snarky] - 14/06/2011 10:17:18 PM 1095 Views
Re: What? - 15/06/2011 12:01:36 AM 1052 Views
Re: What? - 15/06/2011 12:20:56 AM 1010 Views
Re: How come your 1st edit is not at all what was originally posted? - 15/06/2011 03:06:02 AM 1029 Views
About time to reevaluate Tom's claims, I think, eh? *NM* - 15/06/2011 03:59:31 AM 460 Views
my turn: what? - 15/06/2011 04:12:51 AM 1073 Views
Wow, well speaking as a prude... - 14/06/2011 03:36:23 AM 1034 Views
Funny how so many fault lines rupture in the comments to posts like this - 14/06/2011 04:23:23 AM 1129 Views
To quote Cat Valente: - 14/06/2011 04:37:39 AM 855 Views
It is a two-way street, unfortunately - 14/06/2011 04:40:58 AM 971 Views
so the problem is southern women are just not good enough for you? - 14/06/2011 01:51:30 PM 952 Views
No, more like not similar enough - 14/06/2011 04:13:52 PM 975 Views
Some people aren't cut out to be in a relationship - 14/06/2011 04:25:09 PM 993 Views
True - 14/06/2011 04:56:05 PM 819 Views
As someone who has never lived under the same roof more than five consecutive years - 14/06/2011 06:06:10 PM 1068 Views
Job. Always a job matter. - 14/06/2011 11:22:33 PM 1118 Views
Try south Texas, you may not notice you are not in South America - 15/06/2011 02:44:21 AM 900 Views
Ha! I used to live in the metro Miami area, so I know what you mean - 15/06/2011 03:20:41 AM 960 Views
sweet jesus you are crazy - 15/06/2011 04:38:28 AM 812 Views
Maybe, but it certainly drains me of being involved much elsewhere - 15/06/2011 05:29:21 AM 1042 Views
Why all this vitriol? - 14/06/2011 05:19:47 AM 942 Views
It started there here: - 14/06/2011 01:06:32 PM 1011 Views
Tom made an untenable comment - 14/06/2011 01:21:06 PM 916 Views
Book clubs are scary places - 14/06/2011 05:03:03 PM 734 Views
Chocolate, wine, books. Also tea? - 14/06/2011 09:00:06 PM 1041 Views
Maybe without the wine? - 15/06/2011 05:06:53 AM 918 Views
I don't feel particularly vitriolic. - 14/06/2011 10:18:44 PM 939 Views
I didn't mean you... - 15/06/2011 05:24:56 AM 938 Views
We haven't had one of these in a while! - 14/06/2011 06:36:18 AM 978 Views
Agreed. I laughed, I cried, it was touching. *NM* - 14/06/2011 08:49:40 AM 330 Views
This post got more abused than a nasty Japanese bukkake! Lol. *NM* - 15/06/2011 10:07:04 AM 520 Views
I started to read this but got bored and looked at porn. - 14/06/2011 03:15:28 PM 997 Views
Re: I started to read this but got bored and looked at porn. - 14/06/2011 03:27:51 PM 1055 Views
Oh yeah. - 14/06/2011 03:31:42 PM 1030 Views
- 14/06/2011 08:48:55 PM 1028 Views
I think I've read pretty much all of it. I think it's better than porn. Well, bad porn. - 14/06/2011 11:01:20 PM 1002 Views
that was funny *NM* - 15/06/2011 02:42:13 AM 335 Views
Bad porn is the worst! - 15/06/2011 02:13:59 PM 854 Views
You know what Tom, it occurs to me that this is very American thinking. - 15/06/2011 03:07:00 AM 933 Views
Actually, my Russian guy friends tend to be more vehement than I am on this point. - 15/06/2011 05:12:51 AM 1257 Views
Huh, could it be because most Russians are atheist? - 15/06/2011 05:36:47 AM 1040 Views
That could be a major part of it - 16/06/2011 09:06:21 PM 891 Views
Ah, you've seen EuroTrip, too. *NM* - 17/06/2011 01:52:27 AM 445 Views

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