Yeah, some things are lost in translation from one small community to a slightly larger one, I guess. Maybe some of it also deals with having interests that aren't all that common as well.




Yes, that is something I'm trying to change. I want to talk more about what I am witnessing, but I'm caught in that legal trap called confidentiality, so I've learned to say less and less about what I do while trying to figure out more how to just listen. It's a tricky thing, but I'll get there.




It is, I hope. The anthology where it's appearing is full of talented writers and I am looking forward to its e-book (and possible print on demand) release next month.




I don't think that's it, Helene. If anything, it's more a sense that I am not online for "community" aspects, at least not where I'd be actively involved as such, but rather for the discovery and promotion of stories. But I do want to read more about others' lives, even if I don't respond much here. That's the thing. I just don't have the time to make any new two-way online communications work, yet I am not sorrowful that I don't have this time.




There is that and I do that, albeit more away from others' sight. Despite never being an addict, I do reflect upon the first of the Twelve Steps and the Serenity Prayer that the residents say when things come up. I am finding, I hope, that courage to change the things that I can, maybe finding the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change, and perhaps the wisdom to know the difference, just for today, will come. There have been a lot of changes in my life, which is why I wrote this post in the first place, to reflect back upon them.




Because I see some fears that have dissipated (I don't need as much attention as I was drawing back then, I accept that my actions will irritate some on occasion, that I don't need to fear losing contact with others), some excesses have been reduced, if not eliminated, and that I am happier than I have been in a long time, yet I don't need to say that constantly (nor do I need to share my illnesses quite as much). I used to pray often for more humility and I think it's (slowly) developing within me. It just might mean that what's happening must take place away from online locales, because it just cannot be communicated with words. I am still learning a lot from my students about the importance of listening. I just want something to listen to rather than talk at more of the time.