That last part struck me even as I read it, but the spectacle of overinvolved parents interfering on their childrens behalf but to their long term detriment is not new, just more common. Colleges aren't school districts, so there aren't nearly as many parents capable of that level of interference, but that only means the erstwhile terror of the PTA is generally unable to bully university presidents, not unwilling. It's anecdotal, but the article references an example of just how pernicious that can be when the will is accompanied by the ability.
I think these tend to be known as "helicopter parents."
That's the phrase, yup.
Against a little ol' grayhaired schoolmarm most of them can get away with it, but college is a different world, where tenured professors with published articles have thousands of students every year. Little Billys mommy doesn't impress them anymore, and usually has zero leverage; in some courses at some schools teachers are actually pressured to FAIL a certain number of students.*nods* I can see that, too, and there were parts of that I felt did and didn't apply to me, but if any of it is true the salient point that failure must be owned to be overcome certainly is.
Interesting way of phrasing it. "Owning" this kind of failure can take a lot of different forms, I think.
I certainly can't claim "ownership" of that term, but it sums up the concept perfectly, and, yes, it can take many forms. The important thing is recognizing that whatever extenuating circumstances, the responsibility and accountability belong to the individual--for setbacks, and for recovering from them. I haven't always done a great job of it, and it's cost me a lot, but realizing that and doing something about it makes a bigger difference in our futures than almost anything in our past.
"Children need a balance between comfort and toughness" is the real impact the article had on me, despite the fact I don't think that was the authors intent. The Joan Crawford School of Parenting has well documented flaws, but the Purple Dinosaur School has flaws just as fatal if less immediately obvious. Life is neither constant sunshine nor rain, and everyone should learn and deal with that sooner rather than later.
Well said.
Thanks. And congrats once again on making so much sunshine for yourself after pretty heavy rains; if I may be so bold, I'm rather proud of you.
Seems like a rather bad person to be in charge of their suicide prevention program then; isn't listening rather than lecturing to patients kind of Psychology 101? Sorry he was so useless to you.
'sokay. I now have a fantastic therapist, the first one I've ever managed to see for more than three months at a time, and it's been very helpful to me.
Funny, I was just discussing this with someone recently; that kind of continuity seems vital. How can you help someone you barely know with very personal private matters? How can anyone be expected to bare their soul to a stranger? I'm glad you've found someone good and been able to spend some productive time with them; hopes and prayers things only gets better. And that the guy running that program has moved past cookie cutter one size fits all approaches to treating individual human beings with unique problems.
Good to hear from you again though; I'm in and out of FB so little that it's been too long. How's Seattle, the boyfriend, the pippy (a pippy is puppy named "Pippin", you see ) and, of course, you? Not missing lake effect snow, I bet. You and April manage a visit yet?
) and, of course, you? Not missing lake effect snow, I bet. You and April manage a visit yet?
I saw April once or twice in the summertime - need to get in contact with her again, especially since my fiance and I are now devoted Magic players (ah, the shame). And, um, we're also just that: engaged.
And we bought a house yesterday. Life moves quickly out here!Heh, life moves faster the older you get, which is why I just missed you last time I was out there, but glad you made it at last, things are going well and you're having a good time with good people. And, yeah, she's an addict, which is kinda funny 'cos I think Nick's responsible for getting her into Magic, but she never looked back, it seems. If you spend much time around them, you'll play Magic (but Civ is still more fun, of course; hopefully we can all grab a game next time we're out that way; I think there's just enough spots for everyone and their SOs in a full game.
)That's awesome on your engagement and new home; I gotta cach up with you.
How about you? Where are you located now? (Can move this to notes if you'd like.
)
Honorbound and honored to be Bonded to Mahtaliel Sedai
Last First in wotmania Chat
Slightly better than chocolate.
Love still can't be coerced.
Please Don't Eat the Newbies!
LoL. Be well, RAFOlk.
Last First in wotmania Chat
Slightly better than chocolate.
Love still can't be coerced.
Please Don't Eat the Newbies!
LoL. Be well, RAFOlk.
Child Psychology: Are Todays Parents Mental?
- 06/01/2011 11:21:53 PM
1130 Views
Very interesting article, thanks for posting.
- 07/01/2011 01:36:51 AM
723 Views
Welcome, and I'll pass that along to the person through whom I learned of it.
- 07/01/2011 02:19:07 AM
497 Views
- 07/01/2011 02:19:07 AM
497 Views
I just began thinking about how my parents raised me as I was reading this.
- 07/01/2011 02:24:33 AM
627 Views
The middle way seems best; 'grats to you and your folks.
- 07/01/2011 06:35:50 PM
492 Views
Thanks Joel. And I agree with you that most of the time, the middle way is best.
- 07/01/2011 06:52:10 PM
433 Views
meh
- 07/01/2011 02:34:47 PM
637 Views
I disagree; even to the extent that's the real problem it's still down to indulgent parents.
- 07/01/2011 04:52:26 PM
696 Views
exterem paretnal involment is being overstated
- 08/01/2011 03:10:09 AM
632 Views
It's extreme indulgence, not involvement.
- 08/01/2011 03:44:43 AM
654 Views
extreme indulgence is a problem but with one exception those were not good examples
- 08/01/2011 04:47:05 PM
661 Views
"Kids need to feel badly sometimes"? What should we do? Dip their fingers in acid?
- 07/01/2011 03:00:17 PM
561 Views
It would work, and definitely put an end to all this touchy-feeliness.
- 07/01/2011 04:47:16 PM
509 Views
- 07/01/2011 04:47:16 PM
509 Views
I would classify editing the N-word out of Huckleberry Finn to apply to this issue...
- 07/01/2011 11:26:05 PM
596 Views
"Undiplomatic" is one thing, "inflammatory" quite another.
- 07/01/2011 11:51:03 PM
523 Views
Re: "Undiplomatic" is one thing, "inflammatory" quite another.
- 09/01/2011 12:20:47 AM
625 Views
If the stakes are small or there's no alternative I don't mind going with your gut.
- 09/01/2011 01:20:42 AM
595 Views
Re: If the stakes are small or there's no alternative I don't mind going with your gut.
- 09/01/2011 01:28:28 AM
533 Views
Sadly so.
- 09/01/2011 01:32:23 AM
536 Views
Re: Sadly so.
- 09/01/2011 01:41:39 AM
479 Views
Hadn't seen that, no.
- 09/01/2011 11:21:20 PM
630 Views
Re: Hadn't seen that, no.
- 10/01/2011 04:59:53 PM
661 Views
Does M$ have U2 and Steves permission to use their names in that patent application?
- 10/01/2011 07:46:54 PM
610 Views
- 10/01/2011 07:46:54 PM
610 Views
Re: Does M$ have U2 and Steves permission to use their names in that patent application?
- 10/01/2011 09:54:50 PM
614 Views
- 10/01/2011 09:54:50 PM
614 Views
well your reply shows us what we end up with if we have over indulgent parnets
- 10/01/2011 04:08:38 PM
581 Views
It's a good article, but contains a bit of oversimplification.
- 11/01/2011 09:36:35 PM
573 Views
Actually, I tend to agree, 'cos I somewhat agree with rt it diagnoses symptoms better than problems
- 11/01/2011 11:53:48 PM
769 Views
Re: Actually, I tend to agree
- 15/01/2011 08:04:58 PM
613 Views
Re: Actually, I tend to agree
- 15/01/2011 11:30:08 PM
593 Views