Dude. Nobody cares about that kind of crap. Sure, maybe it seems like they do, but that's mostly the lame people with whom you wouldn't want to be friends anyway.

I'm trying to figure out how to express that in a nicer way, but there are plenty of people who can't do anything special. I can't, unless you count being able to flare my nostrils on demand. Why do you need to be perfect? Or beautiful? Or a "star?" If you want to just be, then be. I feel stupid around this site all the time, but I also don't care. That's probably the only difference - I don't let it get me down, and I enjoy myself anyway. If I only thought about how low I rank in comparison to all the amazing things other people can do, I probably would be unhappy.

It does sound like you're officially depressed, however. I think maybe your first baby steps involve finding a counselor you like and commit to the appointments. I hesitate to suggest medication, but I will suggest being open to the counselor's viewpoint. Let him/her know everything.

And, maybe you'll think I'm crazy, but I'm always a huge proponent of talking to loved ones. I would share this with my family, even though it might be painful. You shouldn't underestimate them until they know who you really are and make their judgments based on that.