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In context, it was even worse. Trust me. Larry Send a noteboard - 31/03/2010 08:30:29 PM
Admittedly, "practical parenthesis" is a bit bizarre, and the part between brackets after that needs to go as well. But by pulling the scene out of context like that, it looks worse than it really is, I would imagine, and if one writes literature with a big L and has a certain elegant writing style and all, obviously one has to write the sex scenes in that vein as well, and take some risks with unusual descriptions or images. I think PhotoJim's critique fails to take that into account - of course Lassie isn't written in language like that, but then Lassie isn't Nobel Prize material.

So apart from those two things, I think it's an attempt that isn't without merit - of course it's not very erotic, but then that doesn't seem to be the goal.


It didn't fit with the story at all, I felt, and while it is debatable if Gordimer intended the sex to be perfunctory, the language of the encounter did not fit with the scenes before and after. It felt awkward, not awkward in the sense of trying to capture the awkwardness of first-time sex with someone, but the awkwardness of using euphemisms in a novel that often eschewed them.
Illusions fall like the husk of a fruit, one after another, and the fruit is experience. - Narrator, Sylvie

Je suis méchant.
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How bad would you rate this sex scene? - 31/03/2010 08:25:07 AM 905 Views
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I gave the title above the quote *NM* - 31/03/2010 08:53:01 AM 226 Views
I always use practical parenthesis when dirty-talking". - 31/03/2010 08:51:49 AM 646 Views
I wish she had talked about "The Situation" - 31/03/2010 08:54:44 AM 624 Views
Hey! Veins can be sexy! - 02/04/2010 12:51:58 AM 554 Views
That's outstanding. - 31/03/2010 12:40:41 PM 603 Views
maybe the editor was out of practice *NM* - 31/03/2010 01:10:42 PM 226 Views
Re: That's outstanding. - 05/04/2010 03:00:28 PM 530 Views
I read a lot of sex scenes. - 31/03/2010 02:44:08 PM 622 Views
Ha! - 31/03/2010 08:31:53 PM 529 Views
Wow. Pretty bad. - 31/03/2010 03:08:21 PM 489 Views
I'm gonna be the dissenting voice and say, not that bad. - 31/03/2010 03:34:25 PM 482 Views
In context, it was even worse. Trust me. - 31/03/2010 08:30:29 PM 505 Views
I seem to recall us talking about something like this... - 02/04/2010 12:53:05 AM 594 Views
Bad command or file name. *NM* - 01/04/2010 09:13:40 AM 232 Views
I was hoping that it was a bad translation *NM* - 02/04/2010 04:09:33 AM 239 Views
HAHAHAhahaha. - 02/04/2010 09:28:04 AM 505 Views
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I'm kind of with Legolas. This just reminds me of modernists. - 05/04/2010 10:04:35 PM 522 Views

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