I think the basic problem with Egwene as Amyrlin is that she's sorely misinformed about what leadership and power actually entail. This is understandable, as she lacks any real-world experience of it. She went from a tiny village where power and authority were largely unspoken understandings, to the glittering world of palaces and kings where vassals bowed and scraped and spoke humble words. She never realized that this is merely the public facade, and that those same kings were continually questioned, challenged and balked by their vassals in private. It's not authorial ignorance, either; Jordan had a keen understanding of politics, as we see repeatedly. Rand, Elayne and Fortuona all faced constant opposition and had to build and appease factions in order to rule.

But Egwene really does believe that being a leader means unconditional obedience. She sees it as her job to make the decisions, and her underlings' job to carry them out. Resistance is disloyalty and disagreement is disrespect, unless asked for. And to her credit, she does attempt to educate herself in what she needs to know to make good decisions. But reports can only tell you so much - what all leaders need (and Egwene especially) is good advice, and this is where Egwene falls down. Because she only takes advice from people she trusts, and she only trusts people who are absolutely loyal to her. That is a perilously small number, as of ACOS. She does know this, I think, but she doesn't have the first clue how to go about recruiting allies or encouraging loyalty. She can only demand it - with threats, blackmail, oaths of fealty and finally the complete assumption of dictatorial powers.

From that perspective demanding oaths of fealty is almost natural. Far from being a horrifying imposition that's the next thing to Compulsion when paired with the First Oath, it's becomes a sad but necessary step. A restoration of the natural order. After all, if they'd only obeyed in the first place, as they ought, she wouldn't have had to insist on it!

However it might worth asking: was Egwene necessary? Were the Aes Sedai so blindly factional and hopelessly broken that only a dictator could weld them together in time for the Last Battle? I'm inclined to say yes, especially with the Black Ajah working to widen the divisions. A sad indictment of the White Tower, and a sign that they've long since ceased to be fit for purpose.