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It was better than TGS in places, worse in others DomA Send a noteboard - 21/11/2010 07:45:48 PM
Some of the language in tGS and ToM really grinds my gears.

I know it is impossible for BS to write characters exactly as RJ would have and that some will inevitably change, but I don't think it is impossible to keep the narrative within the same boundaries of vocab and theme as the earlier books.

In particular, the use of modern phrases such as "authorize" "discipline reports" "geometric shapes" and so on has leaped out at me.

The structure of the text and vocab used are greatly different to the RJ written books. This really grates on me and detracts from my enjoyment of the books. It annoys me more than the, slightly off characters that are inevitable when a new writer takes on another's creations.

Does anyone else notice this?


Oh yeah, and I find it very distracting. To me it made a huge difference, as it undermined the immersive quality of the book, even in scenes that were otherwise good or well-done, that and the other language problems. There really was a huge editing job still needed to polish these things out. Where it got really, really distracting is when chapters, or sections, are clearly in Jordan's hand, and others in Brandon. The inconsistencies in language, but also in storytelling style, really jumped at you then. In TOM, it was most obvious with Mat, in TGS more obvious with the WT storyline. Some Mat chapters read just like RJ for a while, then in the middle it starts reading more like a draft, main points for a scene, then there was a bit of completely off humour and wrong rhythm for a scene and then the chapter was back feeling like RJ. That was really annoying to read.

TGS's dialogues were often a pain to read, as Brandon had butchered so many of the formulations, forms of address etc.

He fixed a lot of that in TOM, not enough though as the editing was really not good - there are some TOM chapters in which none of this is corrected, and the bad forms make a return, to vanish in the next chapter. There's no consistency. Proprieties and titles will become a topic in the book, but at the same time no one seems to notice the Amyrlin is referred to as Egwene, or sisters without their sedai honorific by people who shouldn't in any circumstance be so familiar.

Established relationships from previous books are also gone by the wayside. Setalle used to have a complicity with Mat, going all the way back. In TOM it's gone. He now put her more or less in the same bag as the AS, finding her only remotely less annoying. Setalle herself doesn't seem to make up her mind about Mat, addressing him the Aiel way by his full name once, then as Lord Cauthon, then as Mat...

Speaking of Aiel.. it seems every time they are discussed people suddenly adopt their ways of speaking and vocabulary....When has it become the habit for Westlanders to overuse the term "wetlander" so much to speak or think of themselves?

It also seems like everyone has suddenly adopted the habit to call any youngling "child" the way the Tower calls its novices, though the WO more or less returned to their customary "girl" in TOM... except in some chapters, again.

The WOT vocab and the too modern terms aside, what I found really distracting in places was Brandon's lack of mastery of Jordan's brand of the third person limited voice. A lot of them rather felt like the characters were speaking of themselves in the third person.

And while not exactly a language problem, it seems everyone has become a OP expert in WOT all of a sudden (while others like Perrin have forgotten what they knew a while ago! That the Asha'man could tie-up their gateways to let them open longer without tiring themselves, for instance. He mentionned that himself in KOD!).
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