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The golden statue Aeryn Send a noteboard - 06/01/2014 05:55:31 PM

View original postI went into the movie prepared to relax and enjoy the silliness, but I still found much of it almost unwatchable. Aside from a few scenes that I enjoyed (spiders were creepy and not overly ridiculous, woods ditto, some of the acting/actors, <3 Freeman, the intro to Smaug, some of Gandalf being impressive), I mostly could not stop being annoyed with one thing before something else happened got me going again.


View original postI never think of myself as a purist, but I couldn't handle so many stupid diversions. I almost flopped out of my seat in a temper when they "met" Beorn. I can understand why they chose to handle him that way, and I think I could've lived with it if there hadn't been so many other ridiculous things. And I'm not counting the additions - Tauriel was fine, Gandalf-on-quest was fine - because you can't ruin something that didn't exist previously. It's everything else.


View original postWould barrels float if repeatedly dunked under water, presumably filling with water? Gimli was so awesome because he was clumsy, clunky and small, but still managed to be a badass. In some ways, these dwarves are given Elvish powers (ie: Bombur? in the twirling barrel of terror, who then jumps into an empty one), then in the next moment they are slapstick morons.


View original postThorin rode an apparently heat-insulated wheelbarrow down a channel of molten gold...

All that stuff you mention was ridiculous and over the top. I saw the movie three times. Slept soundly through the dwarves' messing around with Smaug twice.


View original postThey blew up a massive statue of a golden dwarf king that they all somehow knew the location of, and exactly what to do to melt it on Smaug (who was then immediately brown again, and went to kill humans!) I swear to god, I'm getting angry again just thinking about it. Maybe Legolas could balance on top of a barrel-bobbing dwarf's head, but should he? Should he?

The golden statue - what they did was pour melted gold into an empty form. It held for a moment, then collapsed.


View original postI don't mind goofy movies; hell, Ice Pirates is one of my favorite flicks. I guess I couldn't quite manage my expectations, because I could NOT get over the implausibility of damn near every action scene. And I really wanted to like them.

I did enjoy the barrel scene. The fat dwarf twirling was unnecessary, but the elves hunting orcs was awesome. This is how I explain improbabilities in movies: it was probably not as easy as that (they fell out of barrels, had to climb back in, etc...), the movie just doesn't show all that, and focuses on only the highlights.

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The Hobbit - The Desolation of Smaug ironclad - 13/12/2013 10:03:50 AM 1590 Views
Sorry, two-legged dragons are just goofy, even if they did the best they could with that limitation Cannoli - 13/12/2013 11:13:34 PM 870 Views
I'm glad I am not the only person who cares about that. nossy - 15/12/2013 08:41:48 AM 791 Views
I don't care whether dragons have "hands" or not, as long as it meets all other draconic reqs. Bookwyrm - 15/12/2013 02:16:15 PM 914 Views
Agreed ironclad - 15/12/2013 03:48:13 PM 699 Views
I'm not looking for "hands." nossy - 15/12/2013 03:48:26 PM 824 Views
The entire concept of a wyvern is a fairly recent one. Tom - 16/12/2013 04:48:15 PM 786 Views
I especially liked Thranduil's scenes. *minor spoilers* Bookwyrm - 13/12/2013 11:25:30 PM 760 Views
such a good physical match for Legolas Aeryn - 14/12/2013 01:22:21 AM 1012 Views
Thought he looked more elf than Elrond and Galadriel put together. Bookwyrm - 14/12/2013 07:13:00 AM 929 Views
He's also in my favorite movie, The Fall Aeryn - 16/12/2013 06:03:22 PM 1313 Views
Re: The Hobbit - The Desolation of Smaug Aeryn - 14/12/2013 01:17:51 AM 986 Views
So how is the new female elf they introduce "Tauriel" Roland00 - 14/12/2013 05:34:56 AM 833 Views
I liked her ironclad - 14/12/2013 10:43:22 AM 777 Views
A lot of reviews said she was one of the best parts of the movie Aeryn - 16/12/2013 06:05:50 PM 999 Views
Have to say, this was even worse than the first one, and I fear the third one may be still worse. Legolas - 04/01/2014 12:32:51 AM 808 Views
You know what I think. I definitely have spoilers. nossy - 04/01/2014 07:23:52 PM 787 Views
No point in arguing about such things, of course ironclad - 04/01/2014 09:51:07 PM 670 Views
This is true. nossy - 04/01/2014 11:22:51 PM 701 Views
This. What Jen said. *NM* Legolas - 05/01/2014 10:28:46 AM 348 Views
"Hamster", not "Hampster". Tom - 05/01/2014 05:28:48 PM 701 Views
It's a Gerbil from the Hamptons. nossy - 05/01/2014 08:11:39 PM 696 Views
Or perhaps a hipster rodent. All the more reason to poison it. *NM* Tom - 06/01/2014 07:54:13 PM 352 Views
I'm going to watch it at some point, but ... Nate - 04/01/2014 10:32:15 PM 873 Views
EXACTLY. nossy - 04/01/2014 11:38:54 PM 781 Views
Ah...Ice Pirates...an underrated classic of the 1980s. Tom - 05/01/2014 05:27:04 PM 731 Views
Underrated? nossy - 05/01/2014 08:14:45 PM 724 Views
The golden statue Aeryn - 06/01/2014 05:55:31 PM 1084 Views
...that doesn't make me feel better. nossy - 07/01/2014 06:41:01 PM 761 Views
Fat dwarves can roll a 20 too, you know? ironclad - 07/01/2014 07:01:17 PM 760 Views
I've been looking at this all wrong. *NM* nossy - 07/01/2014 08:42:47 PM 388 Views
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