M. Night Shyamalan. How could you?

M. Night Shymalan, you are a fucking son of a bitch. You are a goddamned asshole. How could you do this? Did no one proofread your script? Was there no studio oversight? Have you surrounded yourself with yes-men to the point that there is no one to tell you when you are taking a very simple, well thought out story and degrading it into a series of poorly shot scenes and pointless dialogue?

M. Night Shyamalan, how could so monumentally fail? You deserve to be banished from Hollywood for this. Like Prince Zuko, you spoke out of turn in a setting that you had no authority to speak in - epic movies. You deserve the scar that this god awful fucking waste of american cinema will leave on your career, and unless you heroically come back to the homeland with the greatest reboot of all time, you will never be welcome again. Ever. Reboot, not sequel. This movie must be buried, forgotten, and redone.

M. Night Shyamalan, how could you fuck this up? The story IS ALREADY WRITTEN FOR YOU. The character arcs already plotted out, the overlapping arcs of multiple complex characters already elaborately paced and detailed. These poor actors were struggling with the awful words you strung together. An Amazon tribesman with Tourrettes tripping on a hallucinogenic frog could have babbled a more coherent script, even without watching a single episode of Avatar. Yet you (uniformly) wrote every scene without a shred of development, tension, romance or humor.

M. Night Shyamalan, how could you ruin the rich action sequences that thrived in the source material? The action scenes were already sketched for you in brilliant anime style. How, how, how could you make a battle between the last airbender, a waterbender, a camp of imprisoned earthbenders and a squad of fire nation soldiers seem boring??? My mind did not believe what it was seeing, yet there it was! It all just looked so... slow and amateur. tension-less and banal. I hope your children weep for what you have done to their beloved story.

I really wanted to like this movie. I was a fan of this movie up until the moment it started, biting my thumb at every bad review and critic who (accurately) said this movie was an embarrassment to movies. But I couldn't stomach it.

M. Night Shyamalan, you are dead to me.

I feel better now.

Edit: turrets should've been Tourettes.