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Not quite. Lift your ass a little bit. Vodalus Send a noteboard - 30/05/2019 12:51:00 AM

Try that one out the next time someone asks you.


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<rant>
Welcome to today's business buzzword rant. As always, the opinions expressed herein are solely those of the writer and if any are offended they can suck it.

The business jargon word of the day is "aligned." Can you say aligned? I think you can.

This word has become ubiquitous on the endless repetitive conference calls I must suffer through each work day. Meetings are not to seek consensus. Alignment is what we now strive to achieve. When we request sign-off on a solution, we ask, "Are you aligned?" No one says, "I agree" anymore, or "yes, I approve." Rather, "I'm aligned," or just "aligned."

I have begun to detest the sound of the word. I'm at the point that if I went to buy four new tires, I would ask for the free camber and caster adjustment. Never, ever the free wheel alignment.

Let's not stop here. There's still more! Why oh why does the person leading the call inevitably say something like, "I'm hearing that if we blah, blah, blah, then blah, blah blah will be the result." Yes. We heard that as well. Evidently, your ears are functioning just fine. Oh that wasn't your point? You want clarification? To make sure you didn't misunderstand? So, there was a question lurking in there? Well why not fucking say so????

</rant>


南無阿弥陀仏!
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Are we aligned? damookster - 23/05/2019 06:07:06 PM 786 Views
Never heard that one aerocontrols - 23/05/2019 06:28:23 PM 467 Views
Agreed damookster - 23/05/2019 07:30:16 PM 469 Views
I'm laughing with you, and not at you. Jeordam - 23/05/2019 06:33:53 PM 471 Views
We're aligned *NM* damookster - 23/05/2019 07:32:42 PM 220 Views
Yeah, now that I think about it, I do see (and use) that one a lot... Legolas - 23/05/2019 08:27:50 PM 502 Views
This makes me wonder... damookster - 23/05/2019 09:20:56 PM 479 Views
Hm. A lot of the time we just use the English ones, really. Legolas - 23/05/2019 10:23:42 PM 488 Views
Interesting damookster - 23/05/2019 10:42:26 PM 495 Views
Isn't business buzzword a big thing in East Asian Languages / Cultures? *NM* Roland00 - 23/05/2019 11:19:36 PM 234 Views
Don't know. Maybe Tom would know? He's our resident linguist. *NM* damookster - 24/05/2019 03:24:03 PM 273 Views
Thank God no, I haven't heard it. It would change my alignment to Chaotic Evil. *NM* Tom - 23/05/2019 08:46:33 PM 243 Views
You are fortunate. In my last 60 minute call, align or aligned was used 22 times. *NM* damookster - 23/05/2019 09:22:18 PM 241 Views
They are trying to hypnotise you. Roland00 - 23/05/2019 09:02:52 PM 453 Views
Nothing. damookster - 23/05/2019 09:25:16 PM 438 Views
Woe Why do we have ethanol fuel subsidies again? Roland00 - 23/05/2019 11:12:12 PM 436 Views
Thank all gods everywhere that I haven't had that one inflicted on me yet. LiterateDog - 24/05/2019 03:51:10 PM 446 Views
maybe you can introduce it to your coworkers damookster - 24/05/2019 04:42:58 PM 417 Views
Next time, tell them you're a member of this. LiterateDog - 24/05/2019 06:56:02 PM 604 Views
That's me! Non-aligned. *NM* damookster - 24/05/2019 06:59:21 PM 239 Views
So are we Aligned? I ask not of me and work, but instead the UK and the EU? *NM* Roland00 - 26/05/2019 11:43:12 PM 226 Views
No damookster - 29/05/2019 04:55:11 AM 457 Views
You tell 'im, daddy! *NM* LiterateDog - 29/05/2019 05:49:24 PM 217 Views
*NM* The Shrike - 30/05/2019 12:38:10 PM 239 Views
*NM* damookster - 30/05/2019 03:27:21 PM 232 Views
Not quite. Lift your ass a little bit. Vodalus - 30/05/2019 12:51:00 AM 489 Views
+1 *NM* HyogaRott - 02/06/2019 05:34:01 PM 289 Views
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