The business jargon word of the day is "aligned." Can you say aligned? I think you can.

This word has become ubiquitous on the endless repetitive conference calls I must suffer through each work day. Meetings are not to seek consensus. Alignment is what we now strive to achieve. When we request sign-off on a solution, we ask, "Are you aligned?" No one says, "I agree" anymore, or "yes, I approve." Rather, "I'm aligned," or just "aligned."

I have begun to detest the sound of the word. I'm at the point that if I went to buy four new tires, I would ask for the free camber and caster adjustment. Never, ever the free wheel alignment.

Let's not stop here. There's still more! Why oh why does the person leading the call inevitably say something like, "I'm hearing that if we blah, blah, blah, then blah, blah blah will be the result." Yes. We heard that as well. Evidently, your ears are functioning just fine. Oh that wasn't your point? You want clarification? To make sure you didn't misunderstand? So, there was a question lurking in there? Well why not fucking say so????

</rant>