Journal: Entry for Gaps
The Jesuits don't walk on ice, Sam.
Author: Gaps Send a noteboard
Posted: 26/01/2012 03:46:37 AM
Views: 4707
I’m not sure what I’ll have when I have a moment to stop and think, or what I’ll still possess when I recognize how quickly all of this is progressing. The last year, the last few years... they’re all moving so quickly. I’ve lost sight of who I am, and I’ve lost the grip I had on my understanding of the world. I’m not sure that’s a bad thing, or that it’s somehow actually wrong. We just exist in time - nothing more. So much is purely outside of our control, and outside of that, so much is outside of our understanding. Time moves quickly.
I have made a change, and I’m happy with it. I’m not sure what it’ll bring, but leaving the job I’ve had for five years will certainly cause significant changes in how I live my life, and I’m hoping it’ll be for the better. If I go back for a master’s degree, and if I play my cards right... well, I have options. I know how to project what I am in an aggressive manner given the right opportunity, hence my ability to get the job I just obtained.
If only I didn’t have to worry about my mother, and the terrible choices she made; or, perhaps, just the terrible man she married. If she can hang on just a few more years, I should be able to get to a powerful point. I’ve essentially been homeless twice, almost died in a terrible accident, been on welfare as a child, needed food-stamps, and been told I’d need a prosthetic brace for the rest of my life. I’ve been a merit scholar, squatted four hundred pounds, progressed professionally in a difficult operating environment, and I still have a huge, angry fire in my stomach. Tonight, I want a lot. I hope I wake up pissed off at the world every day for the next twenty years.
I need a plan. And I’ll have one.
I have made a change, and I’m happy with it. I’m not sure what it’ll bring, but leaving the job I’ve had for five years will certainly cause significant changes in how I live my life, and I’m hoping it’ll be for the better. If I go back for a master’s degree, and if I play my cards right... well, I have options. I know how to project what I am in an aggressive manner given the right opportunity, hence my ability to get the job I just obtained.
If only I didn’t have to worry about my mother, and the terrible choices she made; or, perhaps, just the terrible man she married. If she can hang on just a few more years, I should be able to get to a powerful point. I’ve essentially been homeless twice, almost died in a terrible accident, been on welfare as a child, needed food-stamps, and been told I’d need a prosthetic brace for the rest of my life. I’ve been a merit scholar, squatted four hundred pounds, progressed professionally in a difficult operating environment, and I still have a huge, angry fire in my stomach. Tonight, I want a lot. I hope I wake up pissed off at the world every day for the next twenty years.
I need a plan. And I’ll have one.
I really have to write you and tell you my news. *NM*
I’m not sure what I’ll have when I have a moment to stop and think, or what I’ll still possess when I recognize how quickly all of this is progressing. The last year, the last few years... they’re all moving so quickly. I’ve lost sight of who I am, and I’ve lost the grip I had on my understanding of the world. I’m not sure that’s a bad thing, or that it’s somehow actually wrong. We just exist in time - nothing more. So much is purely outside of our control, and outside of that, so much is outside of our understanding. Time moves quickly.
I have made a change, and I’m happy with it. I’m not sure what it’ll bring, but leaving the job I’ve had for five years will certainly cause significant changes in how I live my life, and I’m hoping it’ll be for the better. If I go back for a master’s degree, and if I play my cards right... well, I have options. I know how to project what I am in an aggressive manner given the right opportunity, hence my ability to get the job I just obtained.
If only I didn’t have to worry about my mother, and the terrible choices she made; or, perhaps, just the terrible man she married. If she can hang on just a few more years, I should be able to get to a powerful point. I’ve essentially been homeless twice, almost died in a terrible accident, been on welfare as a child, needed food-stamps, and been told I’d need a prosthetic brace for the rest of my life. I’ve been a merit scholar, squatted four hundred pounds, progressed professionally in a difficult operating environment, and I still have a huge, angry fire in my stomach. Tonight, I want a lot. I hope I wake up pissed off at the world every day for the next twenty years.
I need a plan. And I’ll have one.