I liked them all, and I can see how Refuse might be taken as a slap in the face to the fans, but really I would say its my #2 favorite of the endings. Shepard doesn't play the star childs game and eventually with Liara's archives the reapers are destroyed. Personally I think Destroy is the best one and based on the "best" ending of seeing the person in the rubble start to breath and the crew reluctance to hang Shap's name on the memorial wall strongly suggest he is still alive. Coupled with the Buzz Aldrin scene post credits where he is about to tell the child "one more story.." I would say the Destroy option is hte canon ending for ME4.