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I hate all toppings on pizza. (extra cheese is not a topping) Pizza is pizza. Don't fuck with it. Cannoli Send a noteboard - 10/03/2017 07:14:36 PM

I had homemade pizza during an extended stay at a monastery in New England. They put mushrooms and IDK what all vegetables on the stuff. And it was nuns who made it, so you can't tell them it's awful. Worst case scenario, they'd make it your way, and then you're the guy who made the sisters change their recipe. I resorted to putting lettuce on my pieces, over the soggy vegetable toppings, because at least that way I wouldn't be gagging as I tried to chew and swallow it.

The only acceptable exotic toppings on pizza are those used ironically, like french fries or mozzarella sticks or chicken nuggets. All vegetable matter on pizza should be ingrediants of the actual ingrediants. Meat is acceptable, but superfluous. Cheese inside the crust is only viable in Dominos or Pizza Hut or the like, which are not real pizza. Cheese goes on top, evenly distributed (I'm looking at you, margharita pizza bullshit). Mozzerella is preferable, but "four cheese" is good as long as I cannot identify the other three cheeses by taste.

Don't talk to me about cities associated with pizza. Jersey is where they do it right. New York is just a place for people who are more afraid of Jersey than the smell of their own collective waste. It's where we put all the pussy stuff that Jersey has no time for, like MOMA and the Met and Greenwich Village and the baseball & basketball teams, and the buildings for looking at.

Cannoli
"Sometimes unhinged, sometimes unfair, always entertaining"
- The Crownless

“Tolerance is the virtue of the man without convictions.” GK Chesteron
Deus Vult!
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It's time to return this message board to topics that truly matter - 10/03/2017 04:34:16 PM 1457 Views
As I said on Facebook when this came up - 10/03/2017 05:18:07 PM 999 Views
I had duck and peach pizza and it was grand. *NM* - 10/03/2017 05:46:14 PM 570 Views
Nottingham, universally recognized as the home of pizza - 10/03/2017 05:56:44 PM 950 Views
This particular place - 10/03/2017 06:40:03 PM 982 Views
O the horror - 10/03/2017 06:42:44 PM 997 Views
I've had eggs on pizza, here. - 10/03/2017 09:42:17 PM 971 Views
In which circle of hell dontou reside?! - 10/03/2017 09:58:25 PM 984 Views
Bedfordshire. - 10/03/2017 10:13:44 PM 972 Views
I'm so sorry I hope you managed to find a nice bit - 10/03/2017 10:21:07 PM 943 Views
we see this evil on our side of the pond as well - 10/03/2017 11:16:27 PM 1065 Views
Eggs on pizza is lovely. - 14/03/2017 05:15:05 PM 1018 Views
Hawaiian pizza is a complete abomination *NM* - 10/03/2017 05:35:19 PM 575 Views
spoken like a true New Yorker *NM* - 10/03/2017 05:57:44 PM 589 Views
Beans in chilli is an abomination. Pineapple on pizza is just weird *NM* - 10/03/2017 05:49:20 PM 585 Views
Agreed on beans in chili. - 10/03/2017 06:03:22 PM 983 Views
Then I shall shun them in sympathetic fraternity *NM* - 10/03/2017 08:08:43 PM 602 Views
I like to think of myself as a libertarian when it comes to pizza toppings. - 10/03/2017 05:51:22 PM 995 Views
Ok.... - 10/03/2017 05:53:46 PM 936 Views
They subsume their cheese under tomato sauce!! - 10/03/2017 05:55:24 PM 931 Views
you are wise - 10/03/2017 06:10:12 PM 990 Views
We like extra tomato sauce. The abomination is - 10/03/2017 06:41:37 PM 1009 Views
As the writer of the linked article suggests... - 10/03/2017 06:50:50 PM 923 Views
Is your tomato sauce - 10/03/2017 07:11:33 PM 925 Views
Yes - 10/03/2017 07:28:12 PM 940 Views
In the Midwest . . . - 10/03/2017 10:20:54 PM 886 Views
Tastiest casserole on earth. - 10/03/2017 09:37:28 PM 996 Views
Midwesterner! - 10/03/2017 10:19:01 PM 977 Views
Durn tootin - 10/03/2017 10:24:06 PM 1011 Views
NYC Pizza is perfection. - 10/03/2017 10:33:50 PM 922 Views
What's so great about it? - 10/03/2017 10:42:31 PM 947 Views
What's so great about it? - 10/03/2017 11:46:41 PM 927 Views
I think its the water. - 11/03/2017 01:58:49 AM 948 Views
I'm sold. - 11/03/2017 08:40:09 AM 945 Views
*shrug* - 10/03/2017 05:52:38 PM 982 Views
bah - 10/03/2017 06:06:01 PM 936 Views
Tell you what... - 10/03/2017 06:11:47 PM 965 Views
Hey! - 10/03/2017 06:25:16 PM 1046 Views
Maybe if you tried real mayonnaise you would understand the appeal. - 10/03/2017 06:42:23 PM 989 Views
I've made my own mayonnaise in a blender and in a food processor - 10/03/2017 06:47:16 PM 926 Views
I like a combination of mayonnaise and ketchup with my fries. - 10/03/2017 07:15:00 PM 944 Views
Oh yeah. - 10/03/2017 07:30:15 PM 955 Views
square and... hexagon? - 11/03/2017 12:06:04 AM 1014 Views
*shudders* - 11/03/2017 12:21:30 AM 961 Views
Wife and daughters would really like that - 11/03/2017 12:37:43 AM 1034 Views
I hate all toppings on pizza. (extra cheese is not a topping) Pizza is pizza. Don't fuck with it. - 10/03/2017 07:14:36 PM 965 Views
Yes. If there is one takeaway from this discussion it should be... - 10/03/2017 07:23:55 PM 1018 Views
East Coast bias much? *NM* - 10/03/2017 07:48:24 PM 626 Views
I previously had no problem with the people of Iceland. - 10/03/2017 08:06:49 PM 1125 Views
So you admit you're a Philistine *NM* - 10/03/2017 09:06:22 PM 590 Views
Only if that means, "one who understands whats good in life." *NM* - 10/03/2017 09:28:33 PM 685 Views
Conan the Barbarian knew what is good in life. You do not. *NM* - 11/03/2017 05:25:09 AM 618 Views
*NM* - 11/03/2017 01:59:35 PM 565 Views
How about shrimp and andouille sausage? - 10/03/2017 08:12:26 PM 1012 Views
That fits my requirements. - 10/03/2017 08:44:45 PM 870 Views
It's all good if it doesn't include fruit. Or ranch dressing. *NM* - 10/03/2017 09:18:43 PM 554 Views
Hmmmm. - 10/03/2017 09:25:53 PM 929 Views
*NM* - 10/03/2017 09:29:49 PM 684 Views
Yerk. *NM* - 10/03/2017 09:44:54 PM 560 Views
And here I thought you were sensible. *NM* - 10/03/2017 09:59:35 PM 549 Views
I detest ranch. And it offends my "anti-hype" genes. - 10/03/2017 10:16:48 PM 937 Views
So sorry but I must disagree - 11/03/2017 12:25:17 AM 920 Views
Just the pizza. - 11/03/2017 02:00:36 PM 920 Views
Legalize Ranch - 10/03/2017 09:29:04 PM 1099 Views
People puy ranch dressing on pizza *NM* - 13/03/2017 02:54:42 AM 540 Views
Sadly, some do *NM* - 13/03/2017 03:03:01 AM 531 Views
I forget how close we are to each other sometimes. *NM* - 11/03/2017 06:15:57 AM 531 Views
I have lived in Luosinai three times - 13/03/2017 12:43:09 AM 915 Views
The Icelandic folk were ever wise. - 10/03/2017 08:13:42 PM 960 Views
Blame Canada. - 10/03/2017 09:11:30 PM 1027 Views
Yes. I do. *NM* - 10/03/2017 09:17:33 PM 537 Views
I have no opinion. - 10/03/2017 09:39:25 PM 953 Views
Ah. See my post, above. - 10/03/2017 10:00:14 PM 948 Views
It's not pizza! - 10/03/2017 10:11:17 PM 965 Views
So what's worse then..... - 10/03/2017 11:14:10 PM 1031 Views
Eat it any which way you can. *NM* - 11/03/2017 02:01:18 AM 530 Views
Agreed - 11/03/2017 12:09:06 AM 922 Views
Figs? - 11/03/2017 12:20:43 AM 944 Views
at least no mice - 11/03/2017 12:38:49 AM 965 Views
Pineapple on pizza should be a crime!! - 12/03/2017 02:26:53 AM 954 Views
Emotionally, I agree. - 12/03/2017 02:15:33 PM 942 Views
I'm a Philistine and proud of it. - 12/03/2017 12:24:09 PM 1336 Views
You live in Scotland, do you not? - 12/03/2017 02:11:33 PM 1048 Views
Yes. Scotland's culinary gifts to the world are... - 12/03/2017 03:14:18 PM 1378 Views
I like haggis. Though I have to admit... - 12/03/2017 03:44:52 PM 913 Views
The word casserole is pretty broad over here - 14/03/2017 08:20:36 PM 955 Views
I have a pot of chili simmering on the stove right now - 14/03/2017 08:54:14 PM 893 Views
This is how the Scots make pizza - 14/03/2017 06:01:16 PM 1227 Views
deep fried pizza? - 14/03/2017 06:20:34 PM 991 Views
You can get deep fried pizza in Scottish chippies, btw. - 12/03/2017 03:16:38 PM 1390 Views
Deeply agreed - 15/03/2017 08:25:56 PM 979 Views

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