And by exactly I mean exactly. I manage by being honest about it with my gf. It worked perfectly with my last one, where we had an open relationship and still works pretty great with my current one, even though I will admit it's certainly not easy for her at all times. I told her two weeks into the relationship (4 years ago) that this is how I am, how I always have been and she knows I love only her. So I believe you when you say you love your wife and still feel the need to do this.
Don't let anyone tell you you don't love her because you enjoy flirting with others. That's rubbish.
But your wife deserves to know that this is how you function and maybe she's up for alternatives like roleplaying, threesomes, maybe even an open relationship. Otherwise there'll always be a level of dishonesty and that is not okay. Good luck!
Oh and I, too, am so sick of people pretending monogamy is the only or even natural way of having relationships and their judgmental attitude towards anyone who doesn't work that way.
You shouldn't get so defensive in your Edit, though.
Don't let anyone tell you you don't love her because you enjoy flirting with others. That's rubbish.
But your wife deserves to know that this is how you function and maybe she's up for alternatives like roleplaying, threesomes, maybe even an open relationship. Otherwise there'll always be a level of dishonesty and that is not okay. Good luck!
Oh and I, too, am so sick of people pretending monogamy is the only or even natural way of having relationships and their judgmental attitude towards anyone who doesn't work that way.
You shouldn't get so defensive in your Edit, though.
*MySmiley*
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.
This message last edited by ironclad on 12/02/2013 at 02:19:45 PM
I am on the verge of having an affair
11/02/2013 11:41:57 PM
- 1831 Views
Ditch the wife or stop being a prat.
12/02/2013 12:30:30 AM
- 1089 Views
Great. Helpful advice
12/02/2013 12:33:36 AM
- 972 Views

What exactly do you want to hear?
12/02/2013 12:47:06 AM
- 950 Views
I don't know, something helpful
12/02/2013 12:59:23 AM
- 1017 Views
The telling you to grow up bit wasn't the advice
12/02/2013 01:09:54 AM
- 977 Views
So there is no situation in which advice helps?
12/02/2013 01:23:21 AM
- 1024 Views
I didn't say nobody could help you at all
12/02/2013 01:41:19 AM
- 1006 Views
My opinion ...
12/02/2013 01:21:38 AM
- 1013 Views
That's not really advice
12/02/2013 01:28:42 AM
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Why is it obvious?
12/02/2013 01:42:26 AM
- 1043 Views
Get therapy or get a divorce. Your wife deserves better than the person you're being now. *NM*
12/02/2013 04:00:38 AM
- 535 Views
Careful you don't fall off that high horse
12/02/2013 04:53:11 AM
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You might try 4chan. Their morals seem more in line with the ones you're currently espousing. *NM*
13/02/2013 09:29:04 AM
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What exactly did you want to hear?
12/02/2013 04:31:56 AM
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role play. *NM*
12/02/2013 04:41:07 AM
- 524 Views
I appreciate something other than judgment. Thank you!
12/02/2013 04:51:56 AM
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i was poly for a decade. maybe that's a thing to consider? opening your marriage for both of you?
13/02/2013 05:12:06 AM
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If you don't have kids, then just leave the marriage or have an open relationship. *NM*
12/02/2013 05:19:27 AM
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You have 4 options
12/02/2013 06:03:43 AM
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Number one is not an option, it is a looming and growing disaster.
13/02/2013 02:57:19 PM
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I'm not sure there's enough context to offer much useful advice, but I'd line up incentives
12/02/2013 08:29:41 AM
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I don't judge you. I am exactly the same way.
12/02/2013 01:56:58 PM
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I don't give a shit about polyamory. I give a shit about honesty.
13/02/2013 09:26:56 AM
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Do you want help making a decision, or validation of one already made?
13/02/2013 02:47:59 PM
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Hehe, love that things are pretty much the same around here. *NM*
14/02/2013 12:29:56 AM
- 515 Views