Re: A few things. But I'm not sure I've ever worked anything out - Edit 1
Before modification by Burr at 29/10/2012 05:10:30 PM
My Dad was an alcoholic, suicidal (well, he threatened to. so fucked up) bastard who cheated on my Mom. That was about ten years ago. It has all been swept under the carpet ages ago and my parents are still together. I have mixed feelings about my parents. Dad in particular, of course. My parents marital problems were also the reason for me not having a lot of friends as a teenager.
Now I'm a homophobic gay man (I sometimes wonder if my parents are not to blame?) and have the same problem that every other gay person has. Am I masculine enough?
Oh, and I'm in love with my straight friend. He doesn't mind, I do. It's annoying. (this as a sort of comic relief)
Heheh, been there. Of course, this was when I was under DADT, so he never knew for the longest time. And for a while, I tried so hard to convince myself that I could be the Holmes to his Watson. He could be happily married to some wonderful woman, and I could be happy just being the friend he still hung out with a lot and content myself with studies and music in the between times. And really, that's not a false dream, but only now that I've moved on. It only works when you aren't in love, which is the irony, isn't it? Sooner or later, you'll meet someone soon who will blow you away; so make ready to ride that wind.
I guess everyone thinks that their problems are massive compared to other people's. And maybe all that age old shit still affects me. Can't be helped.