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If they're not close enough to invite to the reception, are they really needed at the ceremony? Vivien Send a noteboard - 15/12/2011 08:18:18 PM
Another thing: are their invitations different- is there any indication that they're not going to be invited to a dinner? For one thing, they should be told so that they eat beforehand and for another thing, wouldn't it affect their expected gift obligation?

But if it's normal in NZ I amagine people are used to it and act accordingly, I'm just kind of curious how it all works out.

Invite everyone you want to the service and provide finger-food refreshments afterwards. This way all the people you want to be there, as well as those who are less close, can share the ceremony with you.

Then the closest people - relations of a certain age, special relations, close friends, etc - are invited to an evening dinner, maybe with a dance afterwards.

Some people will invite a select few for dinner, and then do the rest of the above, inviting everyone to a dance with a cash bar. That's quite normal in NZ, actually. Most weddings I've been to do something like that.
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So it turns out that weddings are expensive... Dannymac - 12/12/2011 04:24:17 PM 1825 Views
I am looking to drop about a grand on my son's rehearsal dinner *NM* random thoughts - 12/12/2011 04:42:53 PM 481 Views
Well, part of it is that the rehearsal dinner isn't on the $5k budget. Dannymac - 12/12/2011 04:46:30 PM 820 Views
It is avoidable, but people will treat you like you're a nutcase if you don't do most of the things nossy - 12/12/2011 05:02:14 PM 863 Views
my first wedding was in church with a pretty dress and a preacher random thoughts - 12/12/2011 06:12:02 PM 801 Views
We had a pretty dress and a notary public in the courtyard of the B&B. nossy - 12/12/2011 09:36:52 PM 852 Views
If I had it to all over again I would have formed a Rock Band and dated supermodels *NM* random thoughts - 13/12/2011 04:20:28 PM 447 Views
*NM* TaskmasterJack - 22/12/2011 10:15:04 PM 448 Views
Heh. Nate - 12/12/2011 05:29:19 PM 946 Views
Re: Heh. Macharius - 12/12/2011 06:02:44 PM 850 Views
Re: Heh. Nate - 12/12/2011 06:44:30 PM 983 Views
Re: Heh. Macharius - 12/12/2011 07:27:16 PM 938 Views
We kept it to about $5000 also (including cost of rings). Macharius - 12/12/2011 06:06:54 PM 863 Views
I would say our wedding was about that. Lici - 12/12/2011 06:45:46 PM 1040 Views
I feel like they only have to be expensive if you let them be. LadyLorraine - 12/12/2011 07:07:59 PM 914 Views
I got married two weeks ago for less than that. Aemon - 12/12/2011 09:56:43 PM 969 Views
Congrats Sareitha Sedai - 12/12/2011 10:03:35 PM 820 Views
Thanks! Aemon - 13/12/2011 02:53:11 PM 821 Views
You've been holding out on us. Congratulations. *NM* TaskmasterJack - 13/12/2011 12:02:39 AM 500 Views
Honestly, I didn't think anyone would care. Aemon - 13/12/2011 03:08:44 PM 795 Views
Hey! No announcement??? Congratulations and may you find many years of happiness! *NM* everynametaken - 13/12/2011 03:27:51 AM 526 Views
No, no announcement. I'm not really the center-of-attention type. haha Thanks though! *NM* Aemon - 13/12/2011 03:10:29 PM 450 Views
Congratulations, my friend. Jacob - 13/12/2011 03:21:22 PM 753 Views
Thanks. Aemon - 13/12/2011 06:38:59 PM 866 Views
Acceptable... Jacob - 13/12/2011 06:40:29 PM 785 Views
OMG! Congratulations! Danu - 14/12/2011 10:43:05 PM 804 Views
Thanks Danu. *NM* Aemon - 15/12/2011 11:08:51 PM 453 Views
i had 500 people at my wedding....... Aisha - 13/12/2011 12:05:38 AM 974 Views
Everybody I have ever talked to that had a big, expensive wedding has told me that in hindsight... everynametaken - 13/12/2011 03:29:34 AM 764 Views
Yes they are. We're planning ours and... callandor1000 - 13/12/2011 02:19:42 AM 858 Views
Some people just don't seem to think outside of the box ironclad - 13/12/2011 09:15:49 AM 949 Views
And several items on that chart are soo unnecessary *NM* ironclad - 13/12/2011 09:41:10 AM 475 Views
They're only as expensive as you make them. Tim - 14/12/2011 10:38:37 AM 784 Views
I'm so glad we went simple. Kaldric - 14/12/2011 03:08:45 PM 932 Views
As someone who had a smaller wedding than was expected by certain people... Danu - 14/12/2011 10:36:57 PM 904 Views
These seem kind of extreme. Vivien - 15/12/2011 06:03:15 AM 923 Views
because of your history you might find a cash bar lame... LadyLorraine - 15/12/2011 12:59:39 PM 964 Views
Not my personal history, but culture. Vivien - 15/12/2011 03:53:12 PM 918 Views
I agree that there are better cuts to make than refreshments LadyLorraine - 15/12/2011 04:35:13 PM 912 Views
Re: because of your history you might find a cash bar lame... callandor1000 - 22/12/2011 01:08:00 PM 923 Views
Yeah, and that's why Russians are all dying of alcoholism. *NM* Macharius - 15/12/2011 01:46:52 PM 490 Views
You don't have to be an alcoholic to prefer not to have a cash bar at a party. Vivien - 15/12/2011 03:37:15 PM 824 Views
It is lame to expect the father of the bride to shell out tens of thousands for a party random thoughts - 15/12/2011 02:00:54 PM 923 Views
seriously. who cares if people think you're "cheap". LadyLorraine - 15/12/2011 04:41:33 PM 830 Views
What my family tends to do (because it's huge) is this: Rebekah - 15/12/2011 02:16:31 PM 975 Views
That's what most German weddings do too. Reasonable. *NM* ironclad - 15/12/2011 03:38:40 PM 445 Views
If they're not close enough to invite to the reception, are they really needed at the ceremony? Vivien - 15/12/2011 08:18:18 PM 932 Views
In most cases, a church ceremony tends to be an open thing. Anyone can come. Rebekah - 15/12/2011 10:11:30 PM 945 Views
Apparently it's becoming more common over here to do weddings on a weekday. Rebekah - 15/12/2011 02:13:57 PM 818 Views
I can't imagine someone in America announcing their wedding was on a weekday. TaskmasterJack - 15/12/2011 10:07:55 PM 1054 Views
People not in America have way more vacation days... *NM* Vivien - 15/12/2011 11:56:22 PM 441 Views
That was part of the logic in my thinking, yes. *NM* TaskmasterJack - 16/12/2011 12:46:53 AM 424 Views
Fridays are actually becoming more common. Sareitha Sedai - 16/12/2011 04:51:41 PM 760 Views
Why does the band get more than the photographer? Amyrlin - 16/12/2011 04:30:29 PM 735 Views
well they do have to split it 4 or 5 ways random thoughts - 16/12/2011 04:38:36 PM 824 Views
The thing is... it's NOT a night's work. Amyrlin - 16/12/2011 09:27:30 PM 1124 Views
Because if you put tiny plastic musical instruments on all the tables, your ears will bleed out. TaskmasterJack - 16/12/2011 10:04:59 PM 1187 Views
My advice based on what I've done so far. callandor1000 - 22/12/2011 01:27:29 PM 789 Views
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