Back before it all exploded, when I was planning a wedding, we were managing to plan things on an extremely simple scale, using free food from family, a free location at a family-owned place, and a small guest list of only about 25 people. And it was still going to run us into the $2000+ range when everything was accounted for. At that point we shrugged, decided the money would be better spent on a honeymoon or a new life together, and tossed all those plans in favour of a simple civil marriage with no guests, no ceremony, no dress, no flowers, no tables, no band, no dance, no gifts, no anything. Just us getting married. It was a great decision. All the stress of planning was gone, our parents all understood and let us do what we wanted, and to hell with everyone else. Simplifying things to that degree was great.
But then sadly she left me because she didn't think she could live with someone who is a slightly picky eater like me, because I had a hard time with some foods and didn't want to eat all the same meals as her. And because she decided I'm not mature enough. So no wedding anyway.
But people spend way too much on that stuff. If they really want it, and can afford it, then okay. But it seems often that people go all out because of societal expectations and dreams of a "perfect wedding". And then half of them get divorved at some point anyway. I feel that it's better to keep it simple and use the money elsewhere. But you need two people who feel that way or else there's no point in even trying to argue it.
But then sadly she left me because she didn't think she could live with someone who is a slightly picky eater like me, because I had a hard time with some foods and didn't want to eat all the same meals as her. And because she decided I'm not mature enough. So no wedding anyway.
But people spend way too much on that stuff. If they really want it, and can afford it, then okay. But it seems often that people go all out because of societal expectations and dreams of a "perfect wedding". And then half of them get divorved at some point anyway. I feel that it's better to keep it simple and use the money elsewhere. But you need two people who feel that way or else there's no point in even trying to argue it.
Warder to starry_nite
Chapterfish — Nate's Writing Blog
http://chapterfish.wordpress.com
Chapterfish — Nate's Writing Blog
http://chapterfish.wordpress.com
So it turns out that weddings are expensive...
12/12/2011 04:24:17 PM
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I am looking to drop about a grand on my son's rehearsal dinner *NM*
12/12/2011 04:42:53 PM
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Well, part of it is that the rehearsal dinner isn't on the $5k budget.
12/12/2011 04:46:30 PM
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It is avoidable, but people will treat you like you're a nutcase if you don't do most of the things
12/12/2011 05:02:14 PM
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my first wedding was in church with a pretty dress and a preacher
12/12/2011 06:12:02 PM
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We had a pretty dress and a notary public in the courtyard of the B&B.
12/12/2011 09:36:52 PM
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If I had it to all over again I would have formed a Rock Band and dated supermodels
*NM*
13/12/2011 04:20:28 PM
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Heh.
12/12/2011 05:29:19 PM
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I got married two weeks ago for less than that.
12/12/2011 09:56:43 PM
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Hey! No announcement??? Congratulations and may you find many years of happiness!
*NM*
13/12/2011 03:27:51 AM
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No, no announcement. I'm not really the center-of-attention type. haha Thanks though!
*NM*
13/12/2011 03:10:29 PM
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i had 500 people at my wedding.......
13/12/2011 12:05:38 AM
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Everybody I have ever talked to that had a big, expensive wedding has told me that in hindsight...
13/12/2011 03:29:34 AM
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As someone who had a smaller wedding than was expected by certain people...
14/12/2011 10:36:57 PM
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These seem kind of extreme.
15/12/2011 06:03:15 AM
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because of your history you might find a cash bar lame...
15/12/2011 12:59:39 PM
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Yeah, and that's why Russians are all dying of alcoholism. *NM*
15/12/2011 01:46:52 PM
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You don't have to be an alcoholic to prefer not to have a cash bar at a party.
15/12/2011 03:37:15 PM
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It is lame to expect the father of the bride to shell out tens of thousands for a party
15/12/2011 02:00:54 PM
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What my family tends to do (because it's huge) is this:
15/12/2011 02:16:31 PM
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If they're not close enough to invite to the reception, are they really needed at the ceremony?
15/12/2011 08:18:18 PM
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In most cases, a church ceremony tends to be an open thing. Anyone can come.
15/12/2011 10:11:30 PM
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Apparently it's becoming more common over here to do weddings on a weekday.
15/12/2011 02:13:57 PM
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I can't imagine someone in America announcing their wedding was on a weekday.
15/12/2011 10:07:55 PM
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Why does the band get more than the photographer?
16/12/2011 04:30:29 PM
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Because if you put tiny plastic musical instruments on all the tables, your ears will bleed out.
16/12/2011 10:04:59 PM
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