Having a need isn't the same thing as being needy.
globug0822 Send a noteboard - 30/06/2011 02:49:12 AM
Nothing to do with insecurity. Some people need to be looked at and admired, or just paid attention to. Doesn't even matter if it's romantic. Even if I'm spending time with someone totally platonically, if someone's not looking at me it's going to bother me. I've even made comments to a few people on non emergency cell phone use when one has the option of interacting with a real live person.
I couldn't tell if you were doing one of those things where you were so blatant it was hard to tell if you're being sarcastic. But basically, "some people just need to be constantly paid attention to," (and that is what this is, constant- the OP says this happens whenever they're out, it's not a one time thing) is essentially the definition of needy and insecure.
I definitely agree that dialing up the obvious checking-her-out might be a good idea, and calm her insecurities (plus, it can be fun- I have nothing against PDAs). But in order to calm her insecurities, let's admit that yes, this girl does seem to have them.
And just to make it snarky:
needy |ˈnēdē|
adjective ( needier , neediest )
(of a person) lacking the necessities of life; very poor : needy and elderly people.
• (of circumstances) characterized by poverty : those from needy backgrounds.
insecure |ˌinsiˈkyoŏr|
adjective
1 (of a person) not confident or assured; uncertain and anxious : a top model who is notoriously insecure about her looks | a rather gauche, insecure young man.
Just because a person is insecure and has a deficiency in something they need doesn't make them bad or unworthy. Just because she constantly does it when they are out doesn't mean she needs attention constantly. When you have a deficiency it just grows worse and worse until you get caught up.
I am not saying that you SAID that she was unworthy, necessarily, but you and most of the people in this thread are implying just that.
She needs attention and doesn't know how to ask for it, I expect. It's not like there is a "I am not having my needs met for Dummies"... unless there is, in which case someone should buy it for her.
~g~
*MySmiley*
CrazedWeasel
"Do not waste time bothering whether you "love" your neighbor; act as if you did...When you are behaving as if you loved someone you will presently come to love him."-- C. S. Lewis
*MySmiley*
CrazedWeasel
"Do not waste time bothering whether you "love" your neighbor; act as if you did...When you are behaving as if you loved someone you will presently come to love him."-- C. S. Lewis
This message last edited by globug0822 on 30/06/2011 at 02:49:29 AM
My girlfriend is insane
29/06/2011 03:49:38 PM
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I doubt she's trying to push you away. She's just that needy and insecure.
29/06/2011 03:57:14 PM
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You are too weak. PUA theory says do the total opposite of what common sense tells you
29/06/2011 06:03:09 PM
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Don't apply pua to a long term relationship...
29/06/2011 06:11:36 PM
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Dump her. Tell her you never were interested in others, but now are due to her constant nagging. *NM*
29/06/2011 06:27:59 PM
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"Baby, you were so insistent when I wasn't doing it that I thought you wanted me too!"
29/06/2011 06:32:48 PM
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That sounds so callous. But it is what I would do. I think that someone could get away with calling
29/06/2011 11:51:43 PM
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When someone complains about a gf/bf, when is it not the consensus that the relationship should end?
30/06/2011 12:13:28 AM
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I am glad you called me on that. I was wrong to jump to jump on the "dump her" bandwagon
30/06/2011 03:46:24 AM
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It's just an annoyed rant! Unlikely she's as insane as the consensus in the thread.
29/06/2011 09:11:45 PM
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Ogle her constantly.
29/06/2011 09:21:41 PM
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^ Danny and Vivien potentially have a point.
29/06/2011 11:00:41 PM
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That's right!
30/06/2011 12:04:49 AM
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That's incredibly insecure and needy. Just... just so you know.
30/06/2011 12:10:50 AM
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Having a need isn't the same thing as being needy.
30/06/2011 02:49:12 AM
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Buy sunglasses. *NM*
30/06/2011 12:36:31 AM
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The man with the practical advice out of left field while everyone else is arguing at home base. *NM*
30/06/2011 01:41:12 AM
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Somebody I talked to brought up a valid possibility that I didn't know existed. I was wrong to jump
30/06/2011 03:41:53 AM
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Good point--those things really screw up some women and different ones have different effects *NM*
30/06/2011 01:53:44 PM
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Tell her you're gay so she doesn't need to worry about you seeming to check them out.
30/06/2011 11:30:03 AM
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If you've had the DISCUSSION, and she's still nagging you...I'd find it annoying. *NM*
01/07/2011 05:50:00 AM
- 258 Views