This page smoked me a kipper and will be back for breakfast in x seconds *NM*
jh Send a noteboard - 21/09/2009 05:59:57 PM
"People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world" - Calvin.
Page load time suggestions
20/09/2009 09:37:49 PM
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This thread is omnipresent across all the boards.
20/09/2009 09:47:57 PM
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Ah, feck.
20/09/2009 09:50:44 PM
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Fixed
20/09/2009 09:58:29 PM
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But!
20/09/2009 10:11:52 PM
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test *NM*
20/09/2009 10:12:42 PM
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Nope.
20/09/2009 10:14:14 PM
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Yeah. It's a CMB post that's simply visible from all boards.
20/09/2009 10:29:42 PM
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this page calculated the answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe and Everything in x
21/09/2009 02:09:48 AM
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this page calculated the Question to the Ultimate Answer of Life, the Universe and Everything in x
21/09/2009 02:10:09 AM
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This page is X seconds faster than TMJ making a quip about MGB and/or Antonio Banderas *NM*
20/09/2009 09:57:19 PM
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Steven Erikson made this page an amateur philosopher in X seconds. *NM*
20/09/2009 10:35:13 PM
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This page predicts the ending of Lost in X seconds
20/09/2009 11:09:55 PM
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This page was held in a trance by the One Ring for x seconds *NM*
20/09/2009 11:34:17 PM
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This page was stuck for x seconds while Captain Kirk made a dramatic pause. *NM*
20/09/2009 11:37:21 PM
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The Man in Black fled across the desert, and this page followed for X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 12:10:00 AM
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This page made the Kessel Run in ___ seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 12:25:32 AM
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This page swears by it's pretty blue bonnet that it will end you in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 12:27:19 AM
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floral! floral bonnet! *NM*
21/09/2009 10:52:50 AM
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Blue bonnets are flowers; does that help...?
21/09/2009 05:32:28 PM
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This page sent the "We're Pathetic. Don't Shoot" message in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 12:28:41 AM
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Bender looked at this page for X seconds before laughing maniacally *NM*
21/09/2009 12:32:32 AM
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This page wants to go to the planet where it's a hero in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 12:33:39 AM
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This page betrayed all the others to the White Witch for candy in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 01:56:01 AM
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this page saved a bunch of money on its insurance in x seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 02:13:24 AM
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The Balrog passed this page in x seconds.
21/09/2009 02:34:03 AM
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This page won the Quidditch House Cup in x seconds. More inside this and my quoted post.
21/09/2009 02:59:39 AM
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Read and Find Out in x seconds. More inside, and inside my previous ones.
21/09/2009 03:14:57 AM
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Actually, Read and Find out doesn't really work. What works is...
21/09/2009 09:54:44 PM
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This page threw itself at the ground and missed in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 02:51:46 AM
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This page is from X seconds in the future, and it's here to kill you. *NM*
21/09/2009 03:02:15 AM
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This page was confused by an episode of Lost after X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 03:08:09 AM
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This page had elves for X seconds and is no longer considered literary fiction. *NM*
21/09/2009 03:11:46 AM
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This page will reverse the polarity in X seconds. That should fix everything. *NM*
21/09/2009 03:55:02 AM
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This page killed three kobolds and a bugbear for X experience. *NM*
21/09/2009 03:57:08 AM
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That's thirty minutes away. This page will be there in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:27:48 AM
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This page wrote Jar Jar/Predator fiction for X seconds. That's why Google linked you here. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:37:48 AM
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This page killed Sylar three times in X seconds. Now they're working together. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:46:23 AM
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This page spent the last X seconds eating dwarf bread. Best just leave it alone. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:05:25 AM
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This Page was plown to peices by (insert Moranth munition here) in xx seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 05:05:27 AM
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This page used Feruchemy to get here in X seconds. That's a whole year of dial-up wasted. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:13:56 AM
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This page channeled the ghost of Alan Turing for X seconds, but only a lonely chatbot noticed. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:27:47 AM
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You just Quantum Leaped in --- seconds??? Something to do witht hat show. *NM*
21/09/2009 08:32:42 AM
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This page complained about the time/date format in x seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 09:43:08 AM
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This page travelled at warp around the sun and went to 1986 for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 10:04:51 AM
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This page was "a harmony of mathematical precision" for x seconds
21/09/2009 10:12:45 AM
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This page became the Emporer's Apprentice in X seconds. Still not as fast as Anakin. *NM*
21/09/2009 10:13:28 AM
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This page headed Southeast on Baka Laka Daka Street for X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 10:15:08 AM
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This page wresteld a Wookie for X seconds. Then lost it's arms. *NM*
21/09/2009 10:20:09 AM
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This page took X seconds to make Marvin want to kill himself. *NM*
21/09/2009 11:07:39 AM
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This page was created by the Heart of Gold's Infinite Probability Drive in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 11:46:38 AM
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This page lasted X seconds before passing out after drinking a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster. *NM*
21/09/2009 11:47:41 AM
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This page was eaten by a Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 11:53:10 AM
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This page looked into the Total Perspective Vortex for X second before going crazy. *NM*
21/09/2009 11:58:42 AM
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This page got into a fight after X seconds in a bar on Unification Day. *NM*
21/09/2009 12:12:53 PM
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This page made God disappear in a puff of logic in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 12:25:21 PM
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This page was constructed by the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 01:48:56 PM
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This page will explode if it loads slower than x seconds per hour *NM*
21/09/2009 01:56:49 PM
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When asked if it was a god, this page said 'yes' in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 02:38:46 PM
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This page considered her proposal for X seconds. For this page, that was an enternity. *NM*
21/09/2009 02:41:28 PM
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This page can show you the world, shinning, shimmering, and splendid in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 02:49:55 PM
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This page changed a rock for the sacred relic in X seconds...then ran from the huge boulder. *NM*
21/09/2009 02:51:17 PM
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This page was created on October the 24th, 4004 B.C. at 9 a.m. in just X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 02:52:39 PM
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This page revealed itself to Mulder for X seconds, but not Scully. *NM*
21/09/2009 02:56:02 PM
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Let's have some Goodkind ones, just for a laugh *NM*
21/09/2009 03:14:40 PM
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This page expressed Gratch's love for Rich-arggg in X seconds *NM*
23/09/2009 02:58:12 PM
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This page only questioned Richard for X seconds. He's always right. *NM*
23/09/2009 03:13:02 PM
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This page watched the entire run of Stargate SG1 in x seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 03:18:04 PM
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Good news, everyone! I've invented a device that loaded this page in ... seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 03:53:34 PM
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This page would have gotten away with it, if it weren't for those meddling X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:11:46 PM
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This page took X seconds to skip reading Elayne's pregnancy chapters. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:14:10 PM
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This page was brought to life by a magical cupboard for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:30:03 PM
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This page balanced on the back of a giant turtle for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:39:33 PM
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This page grasped its cosmic insignificance and went mad in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:45:20 PM
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This page has not finished loading yet. Don't click anything. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:53:02 PM
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This page spread chocolate all over the floor and let Chunk eat his way through in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:55:35 PM
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This page found out everything there is to know about the D man in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:58:19 PM
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This page stopped an alien invasion with glass of water in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 04:59:05 PM
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This page spent billions on a Vegan launch pad so it could talk to its dead father for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:04:28 PM
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This page cursed those filthy, fat, stupid hobbitses for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:05:38 PM
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It took the Librarian X seconds to throw this page out of the Library. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:10:28 PM
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This page was betrayed by Jayne Cobb and spent X seconds loading in a box on Canton. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:18:33 PM
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This page can kill you with its brain in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:19:13 PM
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Drizzt managed to slash this page 412 times before it finished loading. He felt really bad about it. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:20:06 PM
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This page disbelieved the reality of this site for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:22:01 PM
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1 green and 3 colorless mana were tapped to summon this page. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:22:53 PM
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It took x seconds for this page to sniff and pull its' braid. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:37:43 PM
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This page came from a world where Napolean clones killed Hitler in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 05:49:24 PM
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This page smoked me a kipper and will be back for breakfast in x seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 05:59:57 PM
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This page hit you with a major leaflet campaign in x seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 06:00:48 PM
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This page found out where all the calculators would go in x seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 06:01:37 PM
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This page has an IQ of x seconds. That is the same IQ as x PE teachers. *NM*
21/09/2009 06:03:14 PM
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It took the Torchwood writers x seconds to kill the entire cast of this page. *NM*
21/09/2009 06:04:57 PM
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Samuel Vimes turned this page into Lawful Good in x seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 06:06:59 PM
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Mr Universe intercepted an X second data stream about this page. *NM*
21/09/2009 06:22:29 PM
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This page was so long that Brandon Sanderson split it into X parts. *NM*
21/09/2009 06:55:41 PM
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This page defeated six blademasters in X seconds... eat that, Rand al`Thor! *NM*
21/09/2009 06:57:48 PM
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This page crackled and exploded out of stone sleep in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 07:22:42 PM
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This page revealed it's true nature with the Eye of Odin in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 07:24:19 PM
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This page manipulated Brooklyn into stealing the Grimorium Arcanorum in X secconds *NM*
21/09/2009 07:26:19 PM
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This page wiped out the entire Formic race in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 07:24:57 PM
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For X seconds this page pondered that time is an illusion, lunchtime doubly so. *NM*
21/09/2009 07:25:56 PM
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This page called upon Crom to grant it victory over its enemies for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 07:26:28 PM
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This page's brilliance astonished even itself for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 07:27:03 PM
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This page failed to find any intelligent life for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 07:27:31 PM
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Look, this page doesn't like to say "I told you so", but it told you so X seconds ago. *NM*
21/09/2009 07:28:06 PM
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All your base are belong to this page for the next X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 07:34:23 PM
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While this page loaded in x seconds, Griffith sacrificed his comrades to become Femto *NM*
21/09/2009 08:03:42 PM
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Azathoth destroys the world in the x seconds it took to load this page *NM*
21/09/2009 08:09:07 PM
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The Triforce granted this page the wish to load in x seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 08:12:08 PM
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Thank you for pressing the self-destruct button. Your computer will self-destruct in exactly X
21/09/2009 08:47:37 PM
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This page couldn't figure out where Demandred is for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 08:50:47 PM
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This page found out the hard way that resistance is futile for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 08:54:50 PM
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This page pulled the Sword of Gryffondor from the Sorting Hate in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 08:58:48 PM
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D'argo and Chiana had fantastic sex on this page for X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 09:00:44 PM
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Rygel the XVI, Dominar to over 6 billion subjects, ate this page in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 09:01:35 PM
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This page put down a Goodkind book after X seconds of reading. *NM*
21/09/2009 09:03:39 PM
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Dan Brown tied this page to an ancient conspiracy in X seconds *NM*
21/09/2009 09:04:53 PM
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Jedi mind tricks didn't work on this page for X seconds. Only money. *NM*
21/09/2009 09:08:30 PM
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This page went to Tosche Station for power converters and back in X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 09:28:20 PM
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This page held out its hand and found that it's quite cool for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 09:33:01 PM
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If you strike this page down, it shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine. *NM*
21/09/2009 09:39:21 PM
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This is not the page you're looking for. You can go about your business. Move along, move along. *NM*
21/09/2009 09:41:48 PM
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This page looked like it was saying, "Kiss me, kiss me!" for X seconds. *NM*
21/09/2009 09:42:42 PM
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Bob recalled this page in X seconds while reading a bawdy potboiler. *NM*
21/09/2009 11:58:31 PM
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This page started wailing the blues when the doctor whacked its bottom X seconds ago. *NM*
22/09/2009 12:10:59 AM
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This page consulted Dustin Hoffman on its existential concerns for X seconds. *NM*
22/09/2009 12:18:18 AM
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This page took photographic evidence of fairies seriously for X seconds. *NM*
22/09/2009 12:21:52 AM
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This page pit llamas against squirrels in a X-second deathmatch. *NM*
22/09/2009 12:36:18 AM
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This page converted all Martians to the Jesuit order in X seconds. *NM*
22/09/2009 12:37:57 AM
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This page toured the London Underground with a girl named Door for X seconds *NM*
22/09/2009 01:15:59 AM
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Fiver had a bad feeling about this page for X seconds *NM*
22/09/2009 01:22:35 AM
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Yes! I was trying to think of a Watership Down one. Awesome. *NM*
22/09/2009 04:41:00 AM
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For X seconds, this page was a germ, a rare disease, called "malagolintomontorosis." *NM*
22/09/2009 04:49:08 AM
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By loading in [x], looks like this page arrived just in the nick of time. What does that make it? *NM*
22/09/2009 01:42:46 AM
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How about "This page arrived in X seconds. What does that make it?" *NM*
22/09/2009 02:24:49 AM
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Gollum, and the evil one crept up and slipped away with her X seconds ago *NM*
22/09/2009 02:16:32 AM
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Moist von Lipwig completely fixed this page up in X seconds. *NM*
22/09/2009 02:26:53 AM
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Some oldies: This page grokked you in X seconds; this page aligned the matrix tower in x seconds *NM*
22/09/2009 02:29:00 AM
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oldies cont: this page jaunted in X seconds; this page assembled an ansible in x seconds *NM*
22/09/2009 02:31:45 AM
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Jewell a Terafin saw this page coming X seconds before it arrived *NM*
22/09/2009 02:33:08 AM
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This page was the bravest little hobbit of them all for X seconds. *NM*
22/09/2009 04:50:45 AM
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This page crossed the River Isen on Midsummer's Eve in X seconds, disguised as riders in black *NM*
22/09/2009 01:50:55 PM
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This page successfully froze time... but only for X seconds. *NM*
22/09/2009 07:12:19 PM
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This page was delayed by x seconds, it was trying to make sense of a sentence in Anathem. *NM*
22/09/2009 07:47:03 PM
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Tash managed x seconds before using Cleanandorâ„¢ on Samuel L. Jackson *NM*
22/09/2009 07:48:48 PM
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This page has been so worried it hasn't buffed its shoes in x days. *NM*
23/09/2009 12:49:16 PM
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Time [x seconds] is a great healer. Unless it's a rash, then you're better off with ointment. *NM*
23/09/2009 12:51:59 PM
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This page will rendevous with Rama in X seconds *NM*
24/09/2009 01:07:48 AM
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Great one. That is one of the best SF-novels ever. Behind Solaris.. *NM*
25/09/2009 10:23:28 PM
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This page sang that there are no cats in America and the streets are paved with cheese for X seconds *NM*
24/09/2009 01:08:31 AM
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It took the scales x seconds to decide whether this page was a witch or not. *NM*
24/09/2009 09:59:59 AM
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This page was turned into a newt for x seconds. It got better. *NM*
24/09/2009 10:01:20 AM
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This page proclaimed: "Oh my God, it's full of stars!" x seconds after arriving at readandfindout
25/09/2009 10:31:52 PM
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This page uncovered the true nature of V'ger x seconds before Kirk
25/09/2009 10:34:54 PM
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A copy of this page was created by the "ocean" on Solaris in x seconds *NM*
25/09/2009 10:36:49 PM
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This page had breakfast x seconds ago. Now it is time for second breakfast. *NM*
27/09/2009 12:57:50 PM
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