I have a lot of my mother in me. I knew I wasn't going to stay near my family; I don't like their lifestyle and I was always kind of the black sheep in terms of intellect. (Believe me, that's a good thing.) I consider Nick and Mike my family now. 
Aww.
SilverWarder Mike? Nick has even less ties with his parents, though he loves his mother dearly. He talks to her a lot less than I do to mine, though.
Huh, I wonder why.
I was always very close to and rather dependent on my family, and it is something that has shaped my life quite a bit so far. People like you have always seemed impossibly courageous to me. But I've been in regular (and I think very good) therapy almost since moving to WA, and I'm starting to acknowledge the less-good aspects of my upbringing. I've also realized that I won't ever be a fully functional adult unless I really change my perspective and work towards the independent mindset (where I do things for myself and feel no shame or obligation towards them). Someday we may reach an understanding, but it's hard to go back in the midst of all this...
I feel like I could learn quite a bit from talking to you and learning more about your story, if you're ever up for that.
Relationship - positive development or signs of eventual break down?
- 19/04/2011 08:48:26 AM
1804 Views
Helene, I want to give you an answer but...
- 19/04/2011 08:58:45 AM
960 Views
Not all inlaws are bad, you know, I prefer some of my inlaws to my own family. *NM*
- 19/04/2011 01:56:03 PM
446 Views
inlaws are not always bad
- 19/04/2011 02:10:18 PM
873 Views
I think they are right
- 19/04/2011 10:20:39 AM
1089 Views
Re: I think they are right
- 19/04/2011 01:59:57 PM
919 Views
I think that's an unfair assumption.
- 19/04/2011 02:16:54 PM
848 Views
What he said about his wife's mother
- 19/04/2011 02:59:32 PM
1015 Views
Ew. I would have a problem with that too. Something about that attitude makes me dig in my heels.
- 20/04/2011 01:37:38 AM
769 Views
No offense...
- 19/04/2011 02:35:53 PM
1000 Views
yes but have you found such a thing?
- 19/04/2011 03:05:35 PM
921 Views
For now I have *NM*
- 19/04/2011 03:08:17 PM
459 Views
*NM*
- 19/04/2011 03:08:17 PM
459 Views
how long has it been? *NM*
- 19/04/2011 03:16:32 PM
434 Views
Yes. But it didn't start out like that. Took years to chip away all our rough edges.
- 20/04/2011 01:40:29 AM
946 Views
He definitely has a point about realistic expectations
- 19/04/2011 01:56:49 PM
918 Views
Re: He definitely has a point about realistic expectations
- 19/04/2011 02:07:34 PM
884 Views
Re: He definitely has a point about realistic expectations
- 19/04/2011 02:23:14 PM
931 Views
You don't strike me as the "screeching-howler-monkey" type to begin with. 
*NM*
- 19/04/2011 03:33:41 PM
429 Views
*NM*
- 19/04/2011 03:33:41 PM
429 Views
I love just about everything about you Sareitha. Good answers all. *NM*
- 20/04/2011 01:26:34 AM
397 Views
I translated "I will think about it" as a secret but obvious code for. "I don't really want to but
- 20/04/2011 01:34:36 AM
1043 Views
that's what I would have meant if I said "I'll think about it" 
*NM*
- 20/04/2011 02:00:33 AM
403 Views
*NM*
- 20/04/2011 02:00:33 AM
403 Views
The fact that you are referring to a fiancé and comparing it to wife says a lot
- 19/04/2011 02:09:27 PM
1024 Views
To be fair, me and my fiance have been together for about as long as they have
- 19/04/2011 02:57:03 PM
876 Views
I don't know about everyone but things changed when we got married
- 19/04/2011 03:16:11 PM
920 Views
How did things change?
- 19/04/2011 04:14:56 PM
931 Views
My husband and I don't understand why people say this.
- 20/04/2011 01:03:31 AM
976 Views
I did say I was only speaking for myself
- 20/04/2011 01:58:45 PM
907 Views
I know.
- 20/04/2011 09:01:11 PM
1140 Views
Re: The fact that you are referring to a fiancé and comparing it to wife says a lot
- 19/04/2011 04:34:34 PM
836 Views
From the information that you have presented...
- 19/04/2011 03:50:19 PM
1070 Views
I am in agreement with you, and I'm not particularly Christian.
- 19/04/2011 04:11:57 PM
855 Views
Which is sad (not the agreement, but their potential future)
- 19/04/2011 06:29:47 PM
934 Views
Oh yes... I'm of course not sure. I can be way off base :-) Let's hope I am.
- 19/04/2011 06:55:13 PM
898 Views
Could go either way.
- 19/04/2011 04:36:02 PM
874 Views
I get the impression that it's more about her forming toward him than vice versa
- 19/04/2011 06:56:37 PM
879 Views
I don't necessarily think it will end in a breakup or divorce.
- 19/04/2011 04:44:11 PM
862 Views
I think you are 100% right about having a good realtionship with your spouse's family
- 19/04/2011 05:07:12 PM
874 Views
I think this is about priorities.
- 20/04/2011 01:07:20 AM
1019 Views
Our priorities may shift over time, too. We're still very young and more tied to our families.
- 20/04/2011 03:09:54 AM
864 Views
Even when younger, I was independent.
- 20/04/2011 05:29:59 AM
769 Views
*nods*
- 20/04/2011 06:25:29 AM
949 Views
- 22/04/2011 04:29:32 AM
1153 Views
- 22/04/2011 04:29:32 AM
1153 Views
I think it's impossible for me to judge their future status without knowing more about them
- 19/04/2011 07:22:32 PM
886 Views
What you said in the original question wouldn't neccessarily mean much to me either way.
- 20/04/2011 01:56:55 AM
874 Views
It's not all out "she's worthless", it's more like "she's a bit silly with all her wishes"
- 20/04/2011 08:46:49 AM
858 Views
I don't know. *NM* (I feel bad for the 20 people who viewed this message- my apologies)
- 20/04/2011 04:36:13 AM
917 Views