You're the last person I expected to take an "Anti-Bernhard Goetz" stance (well, maybe Cannoli). I agree with beetnemesis that self defense, by definition, precludes initiating a conflict, so verbally assaulting someone who responds physically, then responding physically yourself, isn't self defense. However, I also think it's a REALLY bad idea to discourage people from defending themselves since it encourages them to absorb abuse. That's bad enough in itself, but also has the effect of encouraging abuse by fostering the expectation that the only possible response will be later, second hand, from authorities who may or may not be sympathetic to or even believe the accuser.

*totally fights about this with you*