That he comes over while his son is gone doesn't sound so much like co-dependency (if that were the case, I suspect dad would come over while son was home). Or maybe the two are tied together in some way, since it sounds like he doesn't clean your areas of the house/apartment.
he doesn't avoid him, typically, but he did take the opportunity to do something he knows roommate wouldn't want done. And he initially did come into my room, until I just about had a fit. That hasn't happened in a while.
Moving forward, could you suggest that his father wean himself off the habit? Instead of coming over every/other day, try to keep it to once a week, then every other week, once a month, etc. I think it would be better to work with dad, get him to admit he has a problem, and work with it pro-actively. Basically, wean dad off his habit. Suggesting professional help might be a good idea as well, since when confronted with it he seems to at least recognize that there's something not right with how things are now even if he can't control it.
I'm not sure what all has really been tried, but I know he's been "weaned" off before. Then he starts slowly building back up from one day to two and then gets back to almost daily. I don't know if they've discussed professional help.
I'd say that asking for the key back would only be a last-case scenario, to be done after the above.
Yeah, a lot of that has been done, so I think an actual ultimatum was delivered today. Basically, "STOP or I'm not letting you come over."
Does anyone understand co-dependency?
- 29/10/2010 03:59:52 PM
823 Views
It sounds like the man may have some OCD cleaning problems as well.
- 29/10/2010 04:13:28 PM
558 Views
I definitely think so.
- 29/10/2010 05:08:01 PM
548 Views
I dunno.
- 29/10/2010 04:26:19 PM
610 Views
Re: I dunno.
- 29/10/2010 05:11:59 PM
583 Views
I don't think it's offensive.
- 29/10/2010 05:19:03 PM
554 Views
well..even if it isn't offensive by nature, his dad will probably still be offended 
- 29/10/2010 05:25:54 PM
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- 29/10/2010 05:25:54 PM
551 Views
Um... I disagree with "what he's gettingout of it".
- 30/10/2010 12:48:56 PM
536 Views
The father needs to find his own drive, but you probably aren't the one to fix that. *NM*
- 29/10/2010 06:11:57 PM
281 Views
Tell your roomate to sh*t or get off the pot
- 29/10/2010 07:37:35 PM
530 Views
that sounds, er, nice and all
- 30/10/2010 03:07:06 PM
608 Views
- 30/10/2010 03:07:06 PM
608 Views
sorry, but it sounds like the time for "niceness" has long passed
- 30/10/2010 07:28:56 PM
609 Views
