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I'm an extreme introvert, and can be socially inept even around some of my closest friends/family soilent brad Send a noteboard - 05/05/2010 12:30:46 AM
I'm not sure if that counts as an idiosyncrasy or not. And I agree with you and becks et al. However, it's not quite as simple as drinking a potion and becoming Mr Hyde.

But talking is a big part of a date. I hate small talk, but you should be able to segue out of it soon enough if things are going well. You just really need to get over your "talking is the bane of my existence" because this isn't a very mature mentality if you're trying to find someone to date. If talking *is* truly the bane of your existence, as in you get panic attacks and want to pass out while doing it, you should stick to online dating and try to get to know someone before attempting to meet in person. If, however, this is just some idiosyncrasy, and you're really wanting to meet someone, get over it. Do some "small talk" with her at work to get her to start trusting you/getting used to you being around her-- from this casual relationship, when and if you do ask her out, it won't come across as you being a creepy guy she hardly knows that she has to spend time around occasionally asking her out. If this situation does occur, and she says no thank you, it makes your work relationship extremely awkward for both parties involved.

Also, try finding out enough about her that asking her on a date means more to you than just "the hot girl at work". Do you know if you even have any chemistry other than your hormonal reaction?

Umm... yes. Yes we do. She's beautiful, yes, very much so. She's also smart, funny, and sarcastic (I love sarcastic women, don't know why). And, like I said in the post, much friendlier than most women as attractive as she is.

I was going to say more, but it just made me sound pissed off, which I'm not because you made some good points there. And reading it over again, it kind of sounds like that up there a bit, too.

Best of luck! Be confident, and try opening up. If you're too nervous to try this on her, try talking to some of your other co-workers/acquaintances first in order to practice.

Thanks, man.
soilent brad is PEOPLE!

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How well do you actually know her? - 03/05/2010 11:07:21 PM 622 Views
Hmm... you've a point there. - 03/05/2010 11:45:36 PM 663 Views
The reason cinema dates are bad is because you can't talk. - 04/05/2010 12:24:33 PM 576 Views
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Yes, that does sound a bit like me... - 04/05/2010 06:07:06 PM 596 Views
Learn to talk. - 04/05/2010 01:35:46 AM 613 Views
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Yes. - 04/05/2010 04:47:45 AM 584 Views
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Um. That already sounds like an awkward date. - 04/05/2010 01:52:45 AM 607 Views
Possibly, yes - 04/05/2010 02:10:27 AM 667 Views
As long as you eventually open up. - 04/05/2010 02:26:40 AM 555 Views
Exactly - 04/05/2010 02:43:48 AM 584 Views
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That's true ... - 04/05/2010 06:43:20 PM 633 Views
Movie and then to a cafe/pub/something not-dinnery afterwards - 04/05/2010 10:59:05 AM 575 Views
Exactly, I find movie dates work great - 04/05/2010 11:47:51 AM 948 Views
Talking is the bane of my existance! - 04/05/2010 06:12:39 PM 630 Views
I'm not much for small talk either. - 04/05/2010 06:20:51 PM 539 Views
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mispost *NM* - 04/05/2010 10:22:33 PM 227 Views
If it doesn't work you can spread rumours about her *NM* - 04/05/2010 06:21:33 PM 226 Views
Not to sound too harsh... - 04/05/2010 10:24:36 PM 617 Views
I'm an extreme introvert, and can be socially inept even around some of my closest friends/family - 05/05/2010 12:30:46 AM 739 Views
two words: drum solo *NM* - 05/05/2010 01:29:01 AM 265 Views
her - 05/05/2010 04:03:24 AM 574 Views
LOL! Always you, Brad. - 07/05/2010 07:27:57 PM 517 Views
Always - 08/05/2010 06:25:40 AM 692 Views

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