I actually read the Belgarath book and iirc the Polgara one before the Belgariad and Malloreon, but I do think I reread Polgara at least one time after that... didn't really notice retconning, but I dare say I might agree with you if rereading again now. Same with the harpy thing.
The whole Poledra thing is odd, really. Okay, the concept of a wolf becoming a woman in imitation of that man becoming a wolf was clever enough, but the in-story justification for her big disappearance act was always weak. It makes sense enough to want her out of the way so it's just Belgarath and Polgara, but I'm really not sure why she couldn't just die the normal way for that. It's not as if she's that important when she finally reappears openly. I suppose it might be due to Eddings' obsession with pairing off every single character at the end of a series, and his realization that he'd need to do better for Belgarath than some Velvet / that other V-woman (the one with the knives, I forget her name) equivalent.