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Well... Larry Send a noteboard - 09/09/2012 10:57:25 PM
I reluctantly agreed to read two D&D trilogies (Dragonlance: Legends and Forgotten Realms: Icewind Dale) and to give my thoughts in sonnet form. Below is what I composed based off of only reading the blurbs:

Wait, did you agree to read two trilogies and then base your review on the blurbs? What kind of grade would you give your students if you found out they did that? ;)


No. That was the dedicatory sonnet, D&D #1. There shall be at least two more xx(

Let us not to the marriage of true minds

Admit poor D&D, love is not love

Which alters when Forgotten Realms it finds,

Or bends with the Dragonlance to remove.

O no, it is an ever fixèd mark

No mock sonnet would be complete without one of those mis-stressed past participles. Good thinking.


Or the ripping off of Shakespeare's Sonnet #116? ;)

That looks on fell Drizzt and is n'er shaken;

He is the fearsome Elf that is so Dark,

Whose sword rings chill; his measure never taken.

Love's not time's fool, though Crysania be meek

In her love for Raistlin Majere shall bloom,

Love alters not with a brief hour or week,

But bears it out even to prophetic doom:

If this be error and upon me proved,

I never writ, nor no woman so loved.

Bravo! A true masterpiece! :P


Wait a few days for the others, then judge ;)

There will be at least two more of these in the coming weeks. How these are popular with so many is what I am trying to understand.

I haven't read much of them, only a few Dragonlance books. I guess a lot of people like not going outside their comfort zone, and so they stick with what they know? The original Dragonlance trilogy wasn't exactly the pinnacle of fantasy writing, the amazing part is how they then added dozens of other books, most written by other and utterly unknown authors, and somehow kept managing to sell them. And as for Icewind Dale and the other Forgotten Realms books, I'm inclined to say they're much better as computer (or tabletop, of course) games than as books. Haven't played Icewind Dale itself, but I've played other games set in that world - it's an interesting enough world, and some of the games they made in it are masterpieces. But even in that genre of fantasy that relies heavily on worldbuilding and that you're not a fan of, worldbuilding is still only one element and it still takes good writing to make the novel more than fan fiction set in the universe in question.


Well, I was thinking more about why any would have read any such in the first place :P The writing is putrid, to say the least, regardless of the rationales involved ;)
Illusions fall like the husk of a fruit, one after another, and the fruit is experience. - Narrator, Sylvie

Je suis méchant.
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This may be one of the most dire reviews you shall ever read - 09/09/2012 09:12:25 PM 2053 Views
Certainly one of the most original, you get points for that. - 09/09/2012 10:39:00 PM 1312 Views
Well... - 09/09/2012 10:57:25 PM 1303 Views
A review of a D&D bestiary could be more dire. - 09/09/2012 11:29:17 PM 1162 Views
Perhaps - 09/09/2012 11:50:20 PM 1260 Views
Hey now. Owlbears are awesome. - 11/09/2012 02:35:28 AM 1476 Views
That page is painful to behold - 11/09/2012 03:09:29 AM 1301 Views
They are popular as they are fun, easy reading books - 10/09/2012 12:11:24 AM 1241 Views
"Popular", "Fun," and "Easy" doesn't have to be equated with poorly-written - 10/09/2012 12:16:27 AM 1387 Views
Poorly written by what standard? - 10/09/2012 12:29:17 AM 1333 Views
By the standards of what I enjoyed as a nine year-old? - 10/09/2012 01:04:12 AM 1278 Views
So like I said, by the standards of Elitist Literary Snobs - 11/09/2012 12:03:08 AM 1384 Views
Nice attempt at sophistry, but alas, it fails - 11/09/2012 12:38:24 AM 1270 Views
Was that meant to make any sense? - 11/09/2012 01:43:13 AM 1429 Views
Re: Was that meant to make any sense? - 11/09/2012 01:54:23 AM 1282 Views
I'm with Wibble on this (big surprise) - 12/09/2012 03:07:53 PM 1391 Views
Heh. - 12/09/2012 03:43:52 PM 1415 Views
Pretty much so - 12/09/2012 04:19:35 PM 1408 Views
When did you put up that header? - 12/09/2012 04:35:20 PM 1290 Views
I didn't put it up - 12/09/2012 04:51:32 PM 1192 Views
I shall tread lightly so. - 12/09/2012 06:15:51 PM 1325 Views
- 12/09/2012 07:25:29 PM 1185 Views
+6 health? What game are you playing? - 12/09/2012 07:52:52 PM 1230 Views
The Game of Life? - 12/09/2012 08:23:53 PM 1305 Views
Re: Pretty much so - 12/09/2012 08:50:57 PM 1316 Views
You apparently do not read my blog/reviews much - 12/09/2012 09:07:18 PM 1332 Views
Actually, I read them almost never - 13/09/2012 03:07:48 PM 1375 Views
I think my IQ dropped a little bit when I parsed what you said - 13/09/2012 04:16:21 PM 1326 Views
Yep, your usual rebuttal... *NM* - 17/09/2012 02:14:56 PM 660 Views
No, not really - 17/09/2012 06:25:15 PM 1167 Views
Yes, Yes, wrap yourself in arrogance and declare yourself correct until your opposite gets bored... - 17/09/2012 11:12:17 PM 1456 Views
Nah, I just wipe my ass with arrogance - 18/09/2012 12:23:44 AM 1697 Views
The last word with me is rather difficult to obtain - 18/09/2012 02:48:03 PM 1227 Views
Don't try to argue with them. They've made their judgments. They are better than you. - 10/09/2012 09:36:17 PM 1296 Views
Defensive much? *NM* - 10/09/2012 10:31:17 PM 705 Views
He never said you couldn't enjoy it. - 10/09/2012 11:10:11 PM 1427 Views
Indeed - 10/09/2012 11:17:20 PM 1282 Views
But they aren't. - 10/09/2012 11:48:14 PM 1325 Views
Prove it. *NM* - 11/09/2012 03:12:17 AM 636 Views
He also went on to compare liking the books to having the standards of a nine-year-old. - 11/09/2012 02:34:18 AM 1276 Views
You didn't read what I said very well then - 11/09/2012 03:16:21 AM 1290 Views
I believe that they were not meant for adults. - 10/09/2012 12:30:05 AM 1285 Views
Basically, both get dubious kudos for trying something new by the dire standards of the day. - 10/09/2012 11:38:22 PM 1291 Views
Interesting point - 11/09/2012 12:41:01 AM 1253 Views
Are you aware of the game's alignment rules? Some of the novels struggle with this. - 12/09/2012 10:58:37 PM 1269 Views
Not aware of it at all until now - 12/09/2012 11:18:57 PM 1265 Views
How is that possible? - 12/09/2012 11:28:33 PM 1210 Views
My dad was (and is) influenced by Evangelicals - 13/09/2012 12:17:36 AM 1176 Views
Wait, so you didn't read the Chronicles first? - 13/09/2012 02:12:13 PM 1166 Views
No - 13/09/2012 02:18:03 PM 1239 Views
Well, it's sort of like starting Jordan at Lord of Chaos - 13/09/2012 05:18:23 PM 1242 Views
Oddly enough, I started WoT at CoS in November 1997 - 13/09/2012 05:56:04 PM 1191 Views
Chronicles is considerably weaker - 13/09/2012 11:14:38 PM 1269 Views
12 modules, not 15 - 14/09/2012 02:55:39 PM 1404 Views
These threads are so much better than the rape threads! *NM* - 12/09/2012 04:03:01 AM 733 Views
You're just waiting to see if I'll use hexameter in the next one *NM* - 12/09/2012 04:32:31 AM 573 Views
When do we get to see some alexandrines? *NM* - 12/09/2012 12:41:29 PM 662 Views
Or quatrains? - 12/09/2012 03:25:13 PM 1165 Views
At least you didn't read the Baldur's Gate novelizations - 14/09/2012 04:29:17 AM 1192 Views
Sssssh! - 14/09/2012 05:10:19 AM 1253 Views
People become lesbians for no reason! - 17/09/2012 04:34:20 PM 1124 Views
I think my IQ dropped further upon learning of this - 17/09/2012 06:29:29 PM 1162 Views
Baldurs Gate wooooo! - 14/09/2012 04:13:34 PM 1315 Views
Is the review dire because of the subject or the sonnet form? - 14/09/2012 04:24:37 PM 1230 Views
Both - 14/09/2012 04:36:59 PM 1209 Views
it would be unusual for someone to just randomly pick books like that up - 14/09/2012 05:05:37 PM 1474 Views
Interesting scenario - 14/09/2012 10:16:11 PM 1232 Views
Re: Interesting scenario - 15/09/2012 09:55:59 AM 1421 Views
Re: Interesting scenario - 17/09/2012 06:28:57 PM 1156 Views

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