She is so obviously lacking in all the expected womanly traits, I begin to wonder whether you should direct your attention elsewhere. I hear Elsie the barmaid at The Globe Inn in Leighton Buzzard is looking for love with a view to a more permanent relationship......and she can cook and has all her own teeth!
Then there is that brunette at The Unicorn, but then after your latest exploits, perhaps she is not quite as receptive as Elsie could be
Druid
The Old Man of Oz
Object of Desire (retired)
The People's Front For Wongy Jnr.
"I blame Alric"