Two weeks in Cleethorpes perhaps? Or Skegness? Real holidays for real people with real beer and real food. None of that foreign muck!
LOL You don't know how close you are...
I was in Salou in Spain, principally. It's a resort on the costa Dorada, largely populated by Tabloid reading, beer swilling, Football top wearing, effing and blinding English tourists. Who like real food and real beer and none of that foreign muck. I honestly could not find a restaurant in the whole god-forsaken town that served spanish food. Everything was "Real Sunday Lunch" "Real Heinz Tomato sauce" "Best mug of Tea in Spain"...
If I'd heard about it from someone else I'd have laughed.
Needless to say, I spent a lot of time out and about searching for civilisation... I recommend Tarragona as a beautiful city and Barcelona, well it recommends itself.
How was Guadacanal? No unexploded bombs, I take it?
I was raised by a toothless, bearded hag,
I was schooled with a strap right across my back